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We have all been there - the anger, the hate, sorrow and depression, the frustration towards others who do not understand us, but is that fair? Who are we making responsible for our condition? Have we been left to deal with this condition ourselves, as many say? I think so, but I also think that it is often too easy to use this condition as an identifier as to what we are, not who we are.
I have been rated at 70% for PTSD as a combat vet. The following is how I see the way forward for me and I hope it will help some of you. Some of you may hate me for saying some of it, and I understand where you are coming from because I have been there too.
After a few suicide attempts (which were actually attention getting acts), I quickly realized that I am only hurting my possible future and myself if I keep wallowing in self-sorrow and hurt. I stopped looking at the photos of the past and identifying myself as a combat vet instead of Steven. I stopped hanging out only with vets who “understand me” because that was blocking my forward motion. I stopped walking around with a chip on my shoulder. But most importantly of all, I stopped blaming other people, the Army, and anything else for what I am because I knew I needed to work on who I am in order to get ahead, and that became my focus.
Don’t get me wrong, I have days where I could explode and sometimes do. I have days where getting out of bed to go to work is so painful and so pointless that I could easily just roll over and say, “screw it” but I don’t. I know that, if I did, it would be just the beginning of a long downhill spiral effect that would drive me back to where I came from. It would make it next to impossible to be productive for my family and my job, but most of all it would ruin my life. So in the end I have the choice.
I am not a doctor or a psychologist, I am only speaking my opinion but my advice to anyone fighting PTSD is the following: Never feel sorry for yourself. Anger towards others is a waste of time and energy. Looking back at what was, speaking about it every day, wearing the combat vet t-shirts - the constant reminder of “how good it was” - may make you feel better, but it makes your life a constant struggle.
Yes, civilians will never understand, but can you change that? No, so move on. You feel you got screwed over in the Army for this and that, but can you change it? No, so move on. The VA is not accepting your rating, not paying you, not believing you or whatever else, can you change it? Yes you can, but not with hate, anger, screaming or yelling.
Our society believes we are a danger. Some of us like that title – heck, some of us need that title because the military was all we may have ever had as far as an identity. We were special and now we are civilians and no one understands us, they just don’t know. That’s just it though, they don’t know, so either educate them in a meaningful manner or don’t hold it against them and move on. We won’t change anything by being angry and hurting ourselves, so let’s go and get our lives back!
As I was writing this article I actually got a call from my CEO stating that my obvious PTSD is a problem and they need to let me go. It goes without saying this shocked me, but did not surprise me. I am, therefore, positive this is simply a door that needed to close and I am looking with excitement into the future.
We dictate our own realities - no one else can or will really help us, only we can. So make the conscious decision and stand up, be that soldier, warrior and fighter you are and go for the gold. Don’t take no for an answer, accept nothing less from yourself than you expect from others. We can and will be successful, we will prevail, and not because of the stigma but despite the stigma!
Make your plan for life and follow it, set targets, goals, and benchmarks. It is time to stand up and take your life back. Don’t know where to start? Start within yourself and get the anger out. You’re not alone but remember, just complaining to another vet who tells his stories back to you is not going to help you no matter what all these “help sessions” may proclaim. If you feel it helps, then take a deep look at what exactly is being helped. It is probably the short-term frustration - you get to shout and get it out but that solves nothing. It is like getting revenge - it may make you feel better for a short time, but we all know it is wrong and you usually feel remorse afterwards.
So now how do you move forward? You want to yell at me? Write it down. You want to insult me? Go for it. Just know that I am here for you no matter what. If you truly wish to learn more about how to live with PTSD and function in society, I may be able to help. Your hate will only destroy you, not me or anyone else, so please refrain from the emotional explosions that I know all too well. I am writing this as an offer of help, in whatever way it may help, that’s it.
What are the biggest struggles you’ve faced while dealing with PTSD?
I have been rated at 70% for PTSD as a combat vet. The following is how I see the way forward for me and I hope it will help some of you. Some of you may hate me for saying some of it, and I understand where you are coming from because I have been there too.
After a few suicide attempts (which were actually attention getting acts), I quickly realized that I am only hurting my possible future and myself if I keep wallowing in self-sorrow and hurt. I stopped looking at the photos of the past and identifying myself as a combat vet instead of Steven. I stopped hanging out only with vets who “understand me” because that was blocking my forward motion. I stopped walking around with a chip on my shoulder. But most importantly of all, I stopped blaming other people, the Army, and anything else for what I am because I knew I needed to work on who I am in order to get ahead, and that became my focus.
Don’t get me wrong, I have days where I could explode and sometimes do. I have days where getting out of bed to go to work is so painful and so pointless that I could easily just roll over and say, “screw it” but I don’t. I know that, if I did, it would be just the beginning of a long downhill spiral effect that would drive me back to where I came from. It would make it next to impossible to be productive for my family and my job, but most of all it would ruin my life. So in the end I have the choice.
I am not a doctor or a psychologist, I am only speaking my opinion but my advice to anyone fighting PTSD is the following: Never feel sorry for yourself. Anger towards others is a waste of time and energy. Looking back at what was, speaking about it every day, wearing the combat vet t-shirts - the constant reminder of “how good it was” - may make you feel better, but it makes your life a constant struggle.
Yes, civilians will never understand, but can you change that? No, so move on. You feel you got screwed over in the Army for this and that, but can you change it? No, so move on. The VA is not accepting your rating, not paying you, not believing you or whatever else, can you change it? Yes you can, but not with hate, anger, screaming or yelling.
Our society believes we are a danger. Some of us like that title – heck, some of us need that title because the military was all we may have ever had as far as an identity. We were special and now we are civilians and no one understands us, they just don’t know. That’s just it though, they don’t know, so either educate them in a meaningful manner or don’t hold it against them and move on. We won’t change anything by being angry and hurting ourselves, so let’s go and get our lives back!
As I was writing this article I actually got a call from my CEO stating that my obvious PTSD is a problem and they need to let me go. It goes without saying this shocked me, but did not surprise me. I am, therefore, positive this is simply a door that needed to close and I am looking with excitement into the future.
We dictate our own realities - no one else can or will really help us, only we can. So make the conscious decision and stand up, be that soldier, warrior and fighter you are and go for the gold. Don’t take no for an answer, accept nothing less from yourself than you expect from others. We can and will be successful, we will prevail, and not because of the stigma but despite the stigma!
Make your plan for life and follow it, set targets, goals, and benchmarks. It is time to stand up and take your life back. Don’t know where to start? Start within yourself and get the anger out. You’re not alone but remember, just complaining to another vet who tells his stories back to you is not going to help you no matter what all these “help sessions” may proclaim. If you feel it helps, then take a deep look at what exactly is being helped. It is probably the short-term frustration - you get to shout and get it out but that solves nothing. It is like getting revenge - it may make you feel better for a short time, but we all know it is wrong and you usually feel remorse afterwards.
So now how do you move forward? You want to yell at me? Write it down. You want to insult me? Go for it. Just know that I am here for you no matter what. If you truly wish to learn more about how to live with PTSD and function in society, I may be able to help. Your hate will only destroy you, not me or anyone else, so please refrain from the emotional explosions that I know all too well. I am writing this as an offer of help, in whatever way it may help, that’s it.
What are the biggest struggles you’ve faced while dealing with PTSD?
PTSD
Suicide
PTS
Stress
Command Post
Posted >1 y ago
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We are all in this battle together, but we are not losing. With each other's help and understanding we will find our way through and just Maybe some day someone will find a way to diminish the problem. Another thing is, I do agree with you the way Rally Point is going down, that is why I am not on here as much as before. All the political, racial, hate, just to argue, put others down and separate our brotherhood has gotten to be too much. God bless you and all the best for you.
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I just revisited this page after about a year, some great comments here! I hope you are all doing well!
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This Thread is still going...a testament to the need for dialog and clarity in this matter.
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Capt Lance Gallardo
This is what is on the VA's website for Moral Injury:
http://www.ptsd.va.gov/professional/co-occurring/moral_injury_at_war.asp
Doesn't really answer my questions or give a specific answer for its diagnoses or legal status vis a vis a compensable injury?
"Are moral injury and PTSD the same?
More research is needed to answer this question. At present, although the constructs of PTSD and moral injury overlap, each has unique components that make them separable consequences of war and other traumatic contexts.
PTSD is a mental disorder that requires a diagnosis. Moral injury is a dimensional problem - there is no threshold for the presence of moral injury, rather, at a given point in time, a Veteran may have none, or mild to extreme manifestations.
Transgression is not necessary for PTSD to develop nor does the PTSD diagnosis sufficiently capture moral injury (shame, self-handicapping, guilt, etc.).
Consequently, it is important to assess mental health symptoms and moral injury as separate manifestations of war trauma to form a comprehensive clinical picture, and provide the most relevant treatment. One example of a moral injury specific measure is the Moral Injury Events Scale (12). "
http://www.ptsd.va.gov/professional/co-occurring/moral_injury_at_war.asp
http://www.ptsd.va.gov/professional/co-occurring/moral_injury_at_war.asp
Doesn't really answer my questions or give a specific answer for its diagnoses or legal status vis a vis a compensable injury?
"Are moral injury and PTSD the same?
More research is needed to answer this question. At present, although the constructs of PTSD and moral injury overlap, each has unique components that make them separable consequences of war and other traumatic contexts.
PTSD is a mental disorder that requires a diagnosis. Moral injury is a dimensional problem - there is no threshold for the presence of moral injury, rather, at a given point in time, a Veteran may have none, or mild to extreme manifestations.
Transgression is not necessary for PTSD to develop nor does the PTSD diagnosis sufficiently capture moral injury (shame, self-handicapping, guilt, etc.).
Consequently, it is important to assess mental health symptoms and moral injury as separate manifestations of war trauma to form a comprehensive clinical picture, and provide the most relevant treatment. One example of a moral injury specific measure is the Moral Injury Events Scale (12). "
http://www.ptsd.va.gov/professional/co-occurring/moral_injury_at_war.asp
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Capt Lance Gallardo
SGT Steven Eugene Kuhn MBA - I think they are related (PTSD and Moral Injury), and somewhat inseparable, but Moral Injury is more difficult to identify and define than the laundry list of symptoms that have been used to define PTSD. I'll fall back on Supreme Court Justice Stewart Potter's when he was asked to define Pornography: "I know it when I see it."
"I shall not today attempt further to define the kinds of material I understand to be embraced within that shorthand description ["hard-core pornography"], and perhaps I could never succeed in intelligibly doing so. But I know it when I see it, and the motion picture involved in this case is not that." https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_know_it_when_I_see_it
"I shall not today attempt further to define the kinds of material I understand to be embraced within that shorthand description ["hard-core pornography"], and perhaps I could never succeed in intelligibly doing so. But I know it when I see it, and the motion picture involved in this case is not that." https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_know_it_when_I_see_it
I know it when I see it - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
The phrase "I know it when I see it" is a colloquial expression by which a speaker attempts to categorize an observable fact or event, although the category is subjective or lacks clearly defined parameters. The phrase was famously used in 1964 by United States Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart to describe his threshold test for obscenity in Jacobellis v. Ohio.[1][2][3] In explaining why the material at issue in the case was not obscene...
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SGT Steven Eugene Kuhn MBA
indeed, I also believe some try way to hard to find something that may indeed not be there, or be a much smaller degree...but thats just me.
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When I think of PTSD, I think of our ancestors who experienced days of vicious combat at places like Antietam, Gettysburg, or Chickamauga. But, they didn't experience only days; they experienced four solid years of it! They certainly must have been made of sterner stuff than we are today else the hundreds of thousands of them would have been turned into blithering idiots.
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COL Ted Mc
Capt Lance Gallardo Captain; As long as they can keep the "bread and circuses" flowing the optimo iure don't have to worry too much about the mob.
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Capt Lance Gallardo
Best example of that is China. Not much freedom of expression, but the government there has the people under control, especially since Tiananmen Square on June 12, 1989. "Twenty-five years ago Wednesday, Chinese troops violently retook the square in Beijing where pro-democracy protesters had set up camp for weeks. The Tiananmen Square massacre left an unknown number dead, with some estimates in the thousands, and smothered a democratic movement. But after a quarter-century—and a thorough attempt by the Chinese government to conceal the events that unfolded that June—our collective memory is sometimes limited to not much more than an image of a man defiantly standing in front of a tank." from Time Magazine
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COL Ted Mc
Capt Lance Gallardo Captain; The government of the PRC has (so far) been quite successful in raising the average standard of living for the Chinese people. Admittedly when you start with a standard of living as low as it was in 1949 it's reasonably easy to raise it (especially if you cut down on the corruption which existed for the previous century).
Although the Chinese standard of living may seem pretty low to us, if (for example) you are eating meat twice a week that is a BIG improvement over eating meat once a month - to the people who are eating the meat.
IF (and this is only a theoretical) some American political party could come up with a concrete and demonstrably workable program which guaranteed full employment, full housing, sufficient food, adequate medical care, honest and equitable law enforcement, and sufficient leisure time to enjoy life BUT that would entail repealing the "Bill of Rights" and establishing a hereditary ruling class - I'd be willing to bet ten Cyberbucks that they would stand a good chance of sweeping the country.
Fortunately (?) no one has yet come up with a concrete and demonstrably workable program which guaranteed full employment, full housing, sufficient food, adequate medical care, honest and equitable law enforcement, and sufficient leisure time to enjoy life.
Although the Chinese standard of living may seem pretty low to us, if (for example) you are eating meat twice a week that is a BIG improvement over eating meat once a month - to the people who are eating the meat.
IF (and this is only a theoretical) some American political party could come up with a concrete and demonstrably workable program which guaranteed full employment, full housing, sufficient food, adequate medical care, honest and equitable law enforcement, and sufficient leisure time to enjoy life BUT that would entail repealing the "Bill of Rights" and establishing a hereditary ruling class - I'd be willing to bet ten Cyberbucks that they would stand a good chance of sweeping the country.
Fortunately (?) no one has yet come up with a concrete and demonstrably workable program which guaranteed full employment, full housing, sufficient food, adequate medical care, honest and equitable law enforcement, and sufficient leisure time to enjoy life.
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Capt Lance Gallardo
"Give me liberty or give me death," still works for me more than 200 years after Patrick Henry uttered those words. Americans seem to me to be the most stubborn of all people in clinging to their individual freedoms, and suspicion of big government or any government for that matter. Jefferson's warning of their tyranny of government is as relevant today as it was then.
"Why would you trade 1 tyrant 3000 miles away for 3000 tyrants less than 1 mile away"
The movie made famous the real quote uttered by Mather Byles, Cotton Mather’s grandson, to Nathaniel Emmons in Massachusetts. The point of the quote was a very real issue of where the power of a representative republic truly lies. In a monarchy, it was assumed all power was with the royal family. Of course, monarchies do not exist without their own power structure, so that is hogwash.
By instituting a true representative republic, our founding fathers took a huge gamble on how our political structure would evolve and survive. I think it is safe to assume they had no idea of the goliath America would become in elected representation through the sheer number of officials. Have you ever thought of how many local, county, state, and federal elected officials there are in the US? The best data I could find was from 1992 that stated the US had a total of 510,497 popularly elected state and local elected officials. Not sure if that included county officials or not.http://darrenyancy.com/2012/02/27/3000-tyrants-one-mile-away/
"Why would you trade 1 tyrant 3000 miles away for 3000 tyrants less than 1 mile away"
The movie made famous the real quote uttered by Mather Byles, Cotton Mather’s grandson, to Nathaniel Emmons in Massachusetts. The point of the quote was a very real issue of where the power of a representative republic truly lies. In a monarchy, it was assumed all power was with the royal family. Of course, monarchies do not exist without their own power structure, so that is hogwash.
By instituting a true representative republic, our founding fathers took a huge gamble on how our political structure would evolve and survive. I think it is safe to assume they had no idea of the goliath America would become in elected representation through the sheer number of officials. Have you ever thought of how many local, county, state, and federal elected officials there are in the US? The best data I could find was from 1992 that stated the US had a total of 510,497 popularly elected state and local elected officials. Not sure if that included county officials or not.http://darrenyancy.com/2012/02/27/3000-tyrants-one-mile-away/
When Mel Gibsonstarred in the2000 movie The Patriot,he played the role of colonial father and farmer Benjamin Martin. Martin was portrayed as a prominent South Carolina resident whose word carri...
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