Talking to a buddy about safety

Your buddy calls you late at night and tells you about all of the negativity going on in their life. As you listen to them describe his emotional distress, you pick up on some clues that lead you to think that this is a crisis situation. You also remember that they are a firearm owner. You want to ask about their guns because you know it’s not a safe situation under the circumstances, but you’re concerned that they will either hang up on you or, worse, that you’ll put an idea in his mind. What do you do?

People in distress can go from 0 to 60 very fast. Somewhere between 25% and 40% of individuals who attempt suicide make the final decision to act within 5 minutes of the suicide attempt. Nearly 70% make the final decision to act within the hour before their attempt. Easy access to potentially lethal methods for suicide—especially firearms—during periods of intense emotional distress increases the likelihood of bad outcomes such as suicide.

Temporarily limiting someone’s access to firearms and other possible methods for suicide during these periods can reduce the likelihood of a bad outcome, however, it’s similar to how we try to prevent our friends from getting in a car crash when they’ve been drinking. We know that the risk of a car crash increases when someone has been drinking. Because of this, we temporarily restrict access to driving—typically by taking away someone’s keys—when they’ve been drinking. When the person sobers up, we give them their keys back; we don’t prohibit them from driving ever again.

We can prevent suicides using the same mindset. When someone is under a lot of stress, having easy access to a firearm or other methods for suicide can be dangerous. During these times, we can offer to temporarily store a friend’s firearms, medications, or other possible suicide methods until things get better, just like we hold on to their keys when they’ve been drinking.

Here’s an example of how you can raise the issue:

It sounds like things haven’t been going well for you lately. I’m worried about you. Would you be willing to let me hang on to your guns/medications for a while until things get better?

If they don’t feel comfortable with this, consider asking them if they’d be willing to change how they store their firearms or medications instead:

What are your thoughts about storing your guns/medications in a safe or locking them up in another way?

Talking with a friend about locking up or temporarily limiting their access to a firearm or another possible method for suicide can be a difficult topic to discuss, but it can be a simple and effective strategy for helping them get through tough times.

[Video: https://vimeo.com/175761640]

*To learn more about the National Center of Veterans Studies programs visit: https://rly.pt/NCVS