Pro-Choicer Finds Baby Floating Down River, Shoves Him Toward Waterfall To Speed Things Along

"Sources have confirmed that a woman found a baby floating down the Nile River in a basket earlier this week. Some speculate the baby was unwanted, while others think the mother must have been trying to hide the baby from authorities, who may have been persecuting her ethnic group.

"Unfortunately for the little one, the woman was a staunch pro-choice advocate, so she shoved the baby down the river toward a nearby waterfall to "speed things along," saying that the rapids, crocodiles, and sharp rocks would take care of him if the waterfall didn't."

(Note- this is from Babylon Bee, a satire site.)