First- and second-generation Dutch wonder whether they'll ever be considered locals

Living in the Netherlands and trying to learn Dutch, I am assimilating as best I can, until I open my mouth and my American English comes out. Except for the language barrier, I am not afraid to get out into the country. I suppose since I "look" like a European I suppose it is easier for me than for say a person born and raised here by parents from one of the former colonies. Also I've not gotten involved in the expat groups although it might be nice to socialize with other expats too.

"The idea that a newcomer has to go the extra mile to fit in is a common one in the Netherlands, indeed in many countries."

That's kind of the way it works.... If I relocated to Dubai or Thailand, I'd be expected to assimilate. Why is it wrong when a western country asks that of people coming into it? It's not up to a country or the native born populace to make you fit in. That's on you.

Any judgment based on looks alone is a bad thing.