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CWO3 Dave Alcantara
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LTC Stephen F.
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Edited 3 y ago
Thank you my friend COL Mikel J. Burroughs for making us aware that USAF NCO Veteran & volunteer SSgt Alia Schenck will be hosting the Warriors for Life (WFL) Virtual Group Support Wednesday evening virtual meeting for April 7, 2021.
The topic of "Dealing with Shame!" will resonate with many if not all.
Hopefully the discussions and interactions will bless many who participate.
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MAJ Ken Landgren
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Nmemonics is the art of purposely remembering events, speeches, and other applications like sequence of events. There can exist a logical purpose to nmemonics. However, bad events can slide into your memory as well, and you have no power preventing this. Witnessing a powerful event will often become part of the long-term memory. We often remember and can't forget bad events. That is just the nature of the beast. I will enumerate some principles of nmemoics that facilitate the creation of long-term memory:

- You think about it.
- You visualize it.
- It is very tragic.
- It is veryt violent.
- It is very bizzare.
- It is extremely joyous.
- It is extremely sad.
- It is very shameful.
- It is very passionate.

Having said this, I am cognizant that I have many regrets in my life like I was a jackass teen sometimes, I wished I would have pursued a relationship with a particular girl, I wished I would told my father how cool he was, I wished I would have paid back the money my friend loaned me. They became long-term regrets base on my shame.

I noticed in the darkest nights with PTSD I often had racing thoughts in regards to regrets; and most of the regrets were caused by shame for how I behaved in the past or who I was at the moment. These racing thoughts on regrets were quite unbearable.

I was randomly lucky. I served together in the 160th with the psychologist I was seeing at Ft Campbell. He took me under his wing. One day I said doc I don't feel human anymore. That day he had arranged me to go inpatient. I really did not want to go, but in retrospect, it was a safe an appropriate place for me.

One day we discussed my racing thoughts about regrets. He said don't worry about them. I can't change my past, and my regrets were like an anchors that kept me from moving forward. That made a lot of sense to me. That day forward, when I had those thoughts of regrets I told myself that it happened in the past and they don't matter anymore. That strategy worked for me. Of course I learned from my mistakes but it was instrumental that I forgave myself. I rid myself of so much shame, guilt, and regrets. I feel like a free man again.
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