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More from my Time in Service:
Isn't it funny how fear and laughter go together...sometimes. I was in AIT at Tiger Land down there is the swamps of Ft. Polk, Louisiana. We only saw our barracks briefly ...and mostly in the dark. For the Cadre there wanted us to learn as much as we could...hoping we would learn enough to have a chance when we went to Nam. Since everyone training there was supposed to go over. I lucked out...and went to Germany. But they didn't know that at the time...so I was trained like everyone else...in the swamps.
I am a city kid. I know what thugs, bullies, drug addicts, bums, and hobos, look like and act. I know about gangs, the Mafia, and Cops...both good and bad. I know what alleys to walk down, and which to give a wide birth. And I knew which pay phone booths were warm in the winter.
What I didn't know was...anything about Nature. I could easily point to a tree...and say: "Tree." And that is where my knowledge stopped. Is it Oak? Is it Hickory? Is it a Chestnut Tree? (And yes, I am old enough to remember when Ohio was chock full of those beautiful trees, with their edible nuts). Beech? Willow? Couldn't tell you....well except for the willow...because well, it looked really different than the other ones.
And animals? Wild animals? I knew three: Possum, Raccoon, Squirrel. And their ugly cousin ...the inner city Rat. In the sewers those suckers reached mythical proportions. Their cute cousin, the house mouse, well, the cats brought those to us as gifts. Sill alive. And if you ever heard the old saying: "Stop playing with your food." Well, cats do not listen to that at all.
And bugs. We had roaches. Not the 747 kind we have down South here. The tiny ugly ones that slide on the slick spray you used to try and kill them. And ants. We had those, but not the kind that bite, sting, and leave blisters. We had the kind that invade your kitchen and make your Mom go wild, empty all the cabinets, throw out the flour and sugar, and piss your Dad off something fierce as he squatted down under the sink with chemicals that would give Agent Orange a run for its money.
And...spiders.
We had three spiders. Black Widow...stay away. Garden Spiders...big with really cool webs. And Daddy long legs, which were well...all long legged. There were also the Brown Recluse spiders, by far the deadliest of the three others...but luckily, like their name said...they were reclusive. Wood pile varmints that you had to work hard to get bitten by.
So I was ill prepared for Louisiana. Where Spiders climb out of Science Fiction Movies, Nightmares, and sleeping bags with equal aplomb. The biggest one they have down there is called a Tarantula. And here is how I met one for the first time:
We were on patrol. Our Squad split into Alpha and Bravo components. Six of us in each. After slogging through the swamps all morning...in hot humid and stinky not quite land, but not quite water either; we got to "Stand down" for chow.
Me and the other five guys formed a little circle on the only patch of dry ground around. I leaned back against a tree, took off my tin pot and helmet liner. Set my rifle next to my leg, and reached for my trusty P-38 to open a can of peaches. Suddenly, everyone was looking at me. Huge saucer sized wide eyes stared at me like I was an alien.
"What?"
A shaky black hand, at the end of Roundtrees arm pointed at me ...eyes wide with fear.
"Hughes, you have a spider on your head!"
He didn't yell. He didn't raise his voice. He kept it quiet...but strong. I guess he was afraid of startling the spider. A spider I didn't even know was there.
I laughed.
"Yeah, just like there were leaches on me yesterday when we waded that creek."
Nobody smiled. Or laughed at me in remembrance of my panic hurry to strip my clothes off and burn those suckers off like in the movies. Nope, they just wanted to see me do a panicked strip tease. No leaches. I wasn't going to fall for that...again.
But they were still staring at me. Even trying to scoot back a bit using just their thighs and buts. The strange staring look still stuck on their faces. This time all five of them pointed at my head.
"No, Hughes, there really is a spider on your head."
I laughed. These guys were good. They weren't going to let up until they got some kind of reaction.
A few more moments of silent staring and I said:
"Okay, You win. I will just get it off my head."
I reached up, felt something bigger than my hand, and it was soft and furry. When I lowered my hand, all I saw was ...SPIDER. I couldn't see my palm. I couldn't see my fingers. I just saw eight legs as long as my little finger, but thicker, wiggling in a frenzy to upright itself.
I screamed. Yes, inner city kids can scream. It helps.
Roundtree told me later what happened next. Because I was busy screaming and don't remember. So here is how he described the next few moments:
"Man, Hughes, your eyes grew wider than a saucer. And you went from sitting with your legs stretched out in front of you, to a full on sprint. It was the coolest thing...like you had springs in your ass or something. Never saw nothing like it before. One minute you were sitting down, the next you were jetting off into bush at full speed."
As I ran away...I do remember hearing them yell in unison:
"Put the spider down!"
Yep. I still had it with me. Clenched in my fist. When I realized what they were saying, I was a good 50 or 60 meters out into the bush. I hurled the spider down on the ground and kept running. A quarter mile later...I stopped. Fifteen minutes later...here comes my Squad, with two Black Hats Cadre ...and my weapon.
"What the hell, Hughes. Why did you leave your weapon?! And why are you screaming like a little girl?"
"Because of the Spider!
"What spider?"
"The one that was on my head!"
The two Black Hats looked at me like I had heat stroke. Luckily Roundtree stuck up for me.
"He had a Spider on his head Sarge. It was as big as a baseball mitt. He ran away with it in his hand."
So they walk back along my path, I broke a pretty good trail, and sure enough there was the spider stuck in the brambles.
The Black hat laughed.
"Oh, man. That is a big sucker."
Then he turned to me and said:
"But you left your weapon. So you are on point, but give me fifty first."
I know that spider watched me do every one of those fifty. Winking at me with its eight eyes, and legs.
When someone yells at you: "Put ...the ...spider...down." Do it.
they had a blast retelling that story back in the Barracks. I laughed along with them as they told it over and over again...with everyone yelling at the end: "Put the spider down." laughter, fear. They go together.
Isn't it funny how fear and laughter go together...sometimes. I was in AIT at Tiger Land down there is the swamps of Ft. Polk, Louisiana. We only saw our barracks briefly ...and mostly in the dark. For the Cadre there wanted us to learn as much as we could...hoping we would learn enough to have a chance when we went to Nam. Since everyone training there was supposed to go over. I lucked out...and went to Germany. But they didn't know that at the time...so I was trained like everyone else...in the swamps.
I am a city kid. I know what thugs, bullies, drug addicts, bums, and hobos, look like and act. I know about gangs, the Mafia, and Cops...both good and bad. I know what alleys to walk down, and which to give a wide birth. And I knew which pay phone booths were warm in the winter.
What I didn't know was...anything about Nature. I could easily point to a tree...and say: "Tree." And that is where my knowledge stopped. Is it Oak? Is it Hickory? Is it a Chestnut Tree? (And yes, I am old enough to remember when Ohio was chock full of those beautiful trees, with their edible nuts). Beech? Willow? Couldn't tell you....well except for the willow...because well, it looked really different than the other ones.
And animals? Wild animals? I knew three: Possum, Raccoon, Squirrel. And their ugly cousin ...the inner city Rat. In the sewers those suckers reached mythical proportions. Their cute cousin, the house mouse, well, the cats brought those to us as gifts. Sill alive. And if you ever heard the old saying: "Stop playing with your food." Well, cats do not listen to that at all.
And bugs. We had roaches. Not the 747 kind we have down South here. The tiny ugly ones that slide on the slick spray you used to try and kill them. And ants. We had those, but not the kind that bite, sting, and leave blisters. We had the kind that invade your kitchen and make your Mom go wild, empty all the cabinets, throw out the flour and sugar, and piss your Dad off something fierce as he squatted down under the sink with chemicals that would give Agent Orange a run for its money.
And...spiders.
We had three spiders. Black Widow...stay away. Garden Spiders...big with really cool webs. And Daddy long legs, which were well...all long legged. There were also the Brown Recluse spiders, by far the deadliest of the three others...but luckily, like their name said...they were reclusive. Wood pile varmints that you had to work hard to get bitten by.
So I was ill prepared for Louisiana. Where Spiders climb out of Science Fiction Movies, Nightmares, and sleeping bags with equal aplomb. The biggest one they have down there is called a Tarantula. And here is how I met one for the first time:
We were on patrol. Our Squad split into Alpha and Bravo components. Six of us in each. After slogging through the swamps all morning...in hot humid and stinky not quite land, but not quite water either; we got to "Stand down" for chow.
Me and the other five guys formed a little circle on the only patch of dry ground around. I leaned back against a tree, took off my tin pot and helmet liner. Set my rifle next to my leg, and reached for my trusty P-38 to open a can of peaches. Suddenly, everyone was looking at me. Huge saucer sized wide eyes stared at me like I was an alien.
"What?"
A shaky black hand, at the end of Roundtrees arm pointed at me ...eyes wide with fear.
"Hughes, you have a spider on your head!"
He didn't yell. He didn't raise his voice. He kept it quiet...but strong. I guess he was afraid of startling the spider. A spider I didn't even know was there.
I laughed.
"Yeah, just like there were leaches on me yesterday when we waded that creek."
Nobody smiled. Or laughed at me in remembrance of my panic hurry to strip my clothes off and burn those suckers off like in the movies. Nope, they just wanted to see me do a panicked strip tease. No leaches. I wasn't going to fall for that...again.
But they were still staring at me. Even trying to scoot back a bit using just their thighs and buts. The strange staring look still stuck on their faces. This time all five of them pointed at my head.
"No, Hughes, there really is a spider on your head."
I laughed. These guys were good. They weren't going to let up until they got some kind of reaction.
A few more moments of silent staring and I said:
"Okay, You win. I will just get it off my head."
I reached up, felt something bigger than my hand, and it was soft and furry. When I lowered my hand, all I saw was ...SPIDER. I couldn't see my palm. I couldn't see my fingers. I just saw eight legs as long as my little finger, but thicker, wiggling in a frenzy to upright itself.
I screamed. Yes, inner city kids can scream. It helps.
Roundtree told me later what happened next. Because I was busy screaming and don't remember. So here is how he described the next few moments:
"Man, Hughes, your eyes grew wider than a saucer. And you went from sitting with your legs stretched out in front of you, to a full on sprint. It was the coolest thing...like you had springs in your ass or something. Never saw nothing like it before. One minute you were sitting down, the next you were jetting off into bush at full speed."
As I ran away...I do remember hearing them yell in unison:
"Put the spider down!"
Yep. I still had it with me. Clenched in my fist. When I realized what they were saying, I was a good 50 or 60 meters out into the bush. I hurled the spider down on the ground and kept running. A quarter mile later...I stopped. Fifteen minutes later...here comes my Squad, with two Black Hats Cadre ...and my weapon.
"What the hell, Hughes. Why did you leave your weapon?! And why are you screaming like a little girl?"
"Because of the Spider!
"What spider?"
"The one that was on my head!"
The two Black Hats looked at me like I had heat stroke. Luckily Roundtree stuck up for me.
"He had a Spider on his head Sarge. It was as big as a baseball mitt. He ran away with it in his hand."
So they walk back along my path, I broke a pretty good trail, and sure enough there was the spider stuck in the brambles.
The Black hat laughed.
"Oh, man. That is a big sucker."
Then he turned to me and said:
"But you left your weapon. So you are on point, but give me fifty first."
I know that spider watched me do every one of those fifty. Winking at me with its eight eyes, and legs.
When someone yells at you: "Put ...the ...spider...down." Do it.
they had a blast retelling that story back in the Barracks. I laughed along with them as they told it over and over again...with everyone yelling at the end: "Put the spider down." laughter, fear. They go together.
Training
Physical Training
Fear
Humor
Memories
Edited 12 d ago
Posted 12 d ago
Responses: 2
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A beautiful Tarantula! I love them. They are very docile unless startled or harassed.
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SGT Kevin Hughes
Now that’s exactly the reason I have never gone hiking,camping or even strayed off an asphalt path on becoming a civilian again back in1968,I too was raised in the city with all its civilized dangers,encounters with insects that defied description,example Red Ants whose bite was akin to a root canal(,the later capitalized from respect)leeches,tiny stinging bees who could rout an Infantry combat patrol,snakes who traveled in packs,or were big enough to be mistaken for large tree branches,centipedes that could star in Sci Fi movies,throw in a water buffalo charging out of a rice paddy and now you see how civilian Roncari has forsaken flora and fauna to become one with walls floors,windows and doors Ah civilization, Welcome Home Brothers.
Now that’s exactly the reason I have never gone hiking,camping or even strayed off an asphalt path on becoming a civilian again back in1968,I too was raised in the city with all its civilized dangers,encounters with insects that defied description,example Red Ants whose bite was akin to a root canal(,the later capitalized from respect)leeches,tiny stinging bees who could rout an Infantry combat patrol,snakes who traveled in packs,or were big enough to be mistaken for large tree branches,centipedes that could star in Sci Fi movies,throw in a water buffalo charging out of a rice paddy and now you see how civilian Roncari has forsaken flora and fauna to become one with walls floors,windows and doors Ah civilization, Welcome Home Brothers.
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