Posted on Jan 24, 2023
How likely is my spouse to be charged with adultery and fraternization? What type of punishment should be expected?
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While I was deployed, I found out my husband was unfaithful and having extramarital affair with a Pfc from another unit. Him being a SGT. This was not the first time he was unfaithful to me prior adultery affairs. I gathered evidence, such as confessions from previous mistresses and pictures of him being unfaithful, such as kissing, hugging text
Messages showing him being affectionate, making comments like saying I love you to them and he’s so proud to have them as there are lover etc.
Now with this Pfc , I confronted her, and I let her know my husband was married to me, and that it would be smart. If she let us figure out these issues, and to leave him alone. this Pfc was around my child. She showered in my bathroom. She stayed in my house. She slept on my bed. She had sex on my bed. She sent me pictures of them with him on top of her, kissing her on the head and I was able to get pictures from her of them holding hands with his tattoos showing. He has abandoned me in order to be with this girl, and she claimed I was harassing her when I was asking her and begging her to leave my husband alone and let us figure things out on our own upon returning from my deployment. He and she continues the affair upon my return from deployment, and she lied to my commander about not seeing him yet she was caught with him the very same day she lied to my commander and claimed harassment.
The affair is continuing, but I don’t have any new evidence. My husband has been flagged for four months now and today he claims to have a second reading with his battalion commander.
During this whole investigation, I provided sworn statements with dates, timelines, pictures, telephonic confessions from the mistress ( she did not know she was being recorded) but it is legal in my state to record a conversation. How likely is my husband to be punished and what are the punishments looking like this has affected my mental health upon returning from deployment, knowing that I lost my entire family in my home due to the selfish actions of my husband and his private first class who knew what they were doing and had no remorse for the family I am now mourning. Not only is it affecting myself, but it is affecting our child as well..
Messages showing him being affectionate, making comments like saying I love you to them and he’s so proud to have them as there are lover etc.
Now with this Pfc , I confronted her, and I let her know my husband was married to me, and that it would be smart. If she let us figure out these issues, and to leave him alone. this Pfc was around my child. She showered in my bathroom. She stayed in my house. She slept on my bed. She had sex on my bed. She sent me pictures of them with him on top of her, kissing her on the head and I was able to get pictures from her of them holding hands with his tattoos showing. He has abandoned me in order to be with this girl, and she claimed I was harassing her when I was asking her and begging her to leave my husband alone and let us figure things out on our own upon returning from my deployment. He and she continues the affair upon my return from deployment, and she lied to my commander about not seeing him yet she was caught with him the very same day she lied to my commander and claimed harassment.
The affair is continuing, but I don’t have any new evidence. My husband has been flagged for four months now and today he claims to have a second reading with his battalion commander.
During this whole investigation, I provided sworn statements with dates, timelines, pictures, telephonic confessions from the mistress ( she did not know she was being recorded) but it is legal in my state to record a conversation. How likely is my husband to be punished and what are the punishments looking like this has affected my mental health upon returning from deployment, knowing that I lost my entire family in my home due to the selfish actions of my husband and his private first class who knew what they were doing and had no remorse for the family I am now mourning. Not only is it affecting myself, but it is affecting our child as well..
Article 15
Adultery
Fraternization
UCMJ
Posted 3 y ago
Responses: 94
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It is much more serious than you realize. He could face a General Courts-Martial for misconduct unbecoming an NCO and discharged. Being she was an insubordinate he could go to Leavenworth.
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consider yourself lucky who found out and move on he's not worth your time and take your evidence to a divorce lawyer. Sorry for your pain!
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He is a lost cause, cut your loss with him, now that is said. Get yourself a lawyer now! Now have your lawyer review the adultery laws in that state and alien of affection laws, you may be able to sue both through the civilian side of the law. In which case may land you additional funds if not from him but may be from both depending on the laws. So, there is a small chance that they both will just keep on paying based on what the judge awards you.
If your evidence is as strong as you say, more of your evidence may be allowed in in civil court then most other court cases, again this is based on the state you are in.
It is good for you that your command is involved and is perusing this matter, unlike my command was in my similar case.
Sue the crap out of them
If your evidence is as strong as you say, more of your evidence may be allowed in in civil court then most other court cases, again this is based on the state you are in.
It is good for you that your command is involved and is perusing this matter, unlike my command was in my similar case.
Sue the crap out of them
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Not going to happen.
The Army only wears blinders. So do not look for them to see it any other way.
I lost my carrier over this. I understand what your going through. I did not want my kids growing up in divorced home. In the end I needed to be happy.
You need to decide.
If you want the kids you need to file for emergency order of custody before hand. Do not let him know. Then you need to file for a divorce and kick him out. The only way you will be protected is by filling emergency order of custody. Other wise you will have to move into the barracks. If you go this route you need to be prepared. You will have your kids but you'll also you will become non deployable. That means you could possibly be chaptered out. It is Honorable Discharge ......
This will not stop. He will continue to do this. The last thing anyone needs to have on their mind while deployed is if their spouse is cheating on them.
I noticed this was 8 months ago. I hope you left that POS ....
The Army only wears blinders. So do not look for them to see it any other way.
I lost my carrier over this. I understand what your going through. I did not want my kids growing up in divorced home. In the end I needed to be happy.
You need to decide.
If you want the kids you need to file for emergency order of custody before hand. Do not let him know. Then you need to file for a divorce and kick him out. The only way you will be protected is by filling emergency order of custody. Other wise you will have to move into the barracks. If you go this route you need to be prepared. You will have your kids but you'll also you will become non deployable. That means you could possibly be chaptered out. It is Honorable Discharge ......
This will not stop. He will continue to do this. The last thing anyone needs to have on their mind while deployed is if their spouse is cheating on them.
I noticed this was 8 months ago. I hope you left that POS ....
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Okay, there are a couple things you seriously need to consider. First, DO NOT have any further contact with the PFC. Karma will take care of her sorry ass. He has abandoned you and your child to be with this C-word B-word. Let her have him, trust me, he'll cheat on her, too. Second, get a good lawyer and file for divorce. You have documented proof of infidelity, so you also occupy the moral high ground. This asshole cheated on you while you were deployed. Third, don't believe a word he says from this point forward. Any kind of apology/reasons/excuses are nothing more than him trying to save his own ass. Fourth, don't waste any more of your time or energy on what charges/discipline he might get. He has proven he's not worth your time or effort. Drop him like a bad habit, walk away with your head held high, and take that sorry sack of shit for everything he has. Make sure the divorce decree includes monthly alimony and child support. I have been on the receiving end of infidelity, and it hurts. Unfortunately, we had to be separated for a period of two years before any filing for divorce could happen. Once that divorce happened, I moved on, but it took time. I found out after the fact that I had been paying child support for another man's kid for 13 years. No recourse on that. Stop worrying about punishment from the military. It sounds like he's getting a field grade Article 15 at the very least. If he's just about stupid enough to request a Court Martial, he's going to get turned, burned and flayed. Kick him to the curb, walk away, and restart your life. There's someone out there who deserves you, and you will find each other eventually.
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Turn copies of the evidence you have over to her chain of command. Have a meeting with her Commander and First Sergeant, and express your desire to see her brought up on charges as well as your husband.
Her commander will not be really happy with either of them. Commanders hate when a spouse comes in with proof of this. Trust me, the Captain that was having an affair with my ex wishes that I had never dropped off the photos with his boss. He went from a promising military career to attending Truck Master with a Big Chicken Dinner.
Her commander will not be really happy with either of them. Commanders hate when a spouse comes in with proof of this. Trust me, the Captain that was having an affair with my ex wishes that I had never dropped off the photos with his boss. He went from a promising military career to attending Truck Master with a Big Chicken Dinner.
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SGM (Join to see)
Lt Col (Join to see) - I just read an officer would get a
"dismissal notice” which is supposedly the “same as a BCD.” Would it be treated the same in terms of the penalties of a BCD? Hardly seems equitable otherwise.
"dismissal notice” which is supposedly the “same as a BCD.” Would it be treated the same in terms of the penalties of a BCD? Hardly seems equitable otherwise.
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SFC Jerald Bottcher
Yeah getting a dismissal notice is as bad as it gets for an officer.
Usually the worst that would happen for an officer would be a letter of reprimand. and that would be enough to ruin the career. But a letter of dismissal. Ooof
Usually the worst that would happen for an officer would be a letter of reprimand. and that would be enough to ruin the career. But a letter of dismissal. Ooof
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How Common Is Cheating In A Relationship?
44% of people said they had cheated during the relationship being studied.
30% said they know for sure that at least one of their partners had cheated on them.
18% said they suspected a partner might have cheated, even if they weren’t entirely sure. Source: NLM
Different Researches Reveal varying patterns of infidelity occurrences:
20% of married men and 13% married women reported having sex with someone other than their spouse. Source: IFS
67% men and 53% women who cheated on their partner admitted having done this more than once. Source: PRnewswire
`` I WOULD Tell You What I Did, But I'm Allergic To Federal Penitentiaries ---
So Let's Just Say He Was Never Able To Retire - Moved Around Too Much To Build Up Any Retirement Benefits -- Last job Was Walking A Mall In Uniform Looking For The Boogie Man, Then Dropped Dead 2 Years Ago, New Years Day!- That's What I Heard Anyway.
44% of people said they had cheated during the relationship being studied.
30% said they know for sure that at least one of their partners had cheated on them.
18% said they suspected a partner might have cheated, even if they weren’t entirely sure. Source: NLM
Different Researches Reveal varying patterns of infidelity occurrences:
20% of married men and 13% married women reported having sex with someone other than their spouse. Source: IFS
67% men and 53% women who cheated on their partner admitted having done this more than once. Source: PRnewswire
`` I WOULD Tell You What I Did, But I'm Allergic To Federal Penitentiaries ---
So Let's Just Say He Was Never Able To Retire - Moved Around Too Much To Build Up Any Retirement Benefits -- Last job Was Walking A Mall In Uniform Looking For The Boogie Man, Then Dropped Dead 2 Years Ago, New Years Day!- That's What I Heard Anyway.
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The guys a cheat and will always cheat, you can either accept it or divorce him, no other choices.
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I’m sure your divorce is final or soon to be. They both can be (should have been) charged with Article 134. That’s only if you push for it. Most commands don’t prosecute for adultery because if they acknowledge it, then they too can be brought up on charges (Article 134 also) for not reporting the affair.
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