How realistic is it to be completely "fair and impartial "?

In my experience, it is not the good soldiers who take 90 percent of your time.. it is the troublemakers, the unreliable, the ones who just can't seem to get anything right and those who refuse to try. While you are dealing with their BS, top soldiers miss out on mentorship and time with leaders because frankly, there are only so many hours in a day. One bad apple can monopolize all those hours and cause you to neglect up and comers... so from this angle, it is not possible to be truly fair if your time is completely monopolized dealing with issues.

Cultivating talent and being impartial aren't mutually exclusive.

What you are doing is dedicating finite resources, specifically time and effort to your folks. Yes, you are broadly applying the Pareto Principle (the 80/20 rule) of dedicating 80% of your effort to 20% of your folks, however you are segmenting it in different ways.

1) Administratively you only have to worry about 20% of your folks. The rest just don't have issues.
2) Operationally, some guys need more "supervision" than others.
3) Some folks want more mentoring or "cultivation" than others.

The big thing is shifting that time and effort "as needed" and not intentionally forgoing anyone, and saying "I don't have time for PFC Benotz. He's not worth my time/effort, in comparison to PFC Schultz" that's where you cross the line of NOT being fair or impartial. Both of their issues are of equal value, and have to be taken care of, however they won't both have the same quality & quantity of issues at the same time, which makes it subjectively hard to determine whether you are over-dedicating yourself to one, and risk impartialness.

The NCO Creed also states "all Soldiers are entitled to oustanding leadership, I will provide that leadership". As an NCO, I give all of my Soldiers that outstanding leadership to the best of my abilites and capabilities. That is a true statement 20% or Soldiers will take up 90% of your time, that's the problem Soldiers i.e. the ones that are always late, never where they are suppose to be, never in the right uniform the just can't get right Soldiers. As a leader, I am more incline to go that extra mile for a good Soldier that I can depend on and is moitivate, hard charging, and cares about their career in the Army. I give all my Soldiers the best leadership I can give them, but I give extra attention to those Soldiers that go that extra mile for me as a leader.

I wish I could give the majority of my time to my best troops! It seems I end up letting them fend for themselves, while I try to teach high drag a task he learned last month.

Impartial is a relative term. As an NCO you should be helping the soldiers that want to learn grow, and like you said those that don't set the expectations and let them do them until they are out. To me impartial means you don't treat them any differently when it comes to daily tasks or work. Of course you use your shiny pennies when VIPs come through but everyone should be treated equal to their abilities, capabilities, and attitude on the job.

I think it's human nature, however, it's your leadership that regulates how you do it.

There's always potential. The military isn't for everyone. Your first mistake is thinking any of your soldiers are a lost cause. You need to dig deeper as a leader and get to the core of what's really going on. If you can't, then send that soldier to someone who can.

It's a matter of self control. I have one child that excels at everything, and one that I'm constantly "redirecting". It's easy to praise and cultivate one... and I have to remind myself to reward and nurture the other... I love them both, I want the best for both, and I owe it to both.

SGT Daniel Aldana, from a Soldiers perspective, no Soldier is a lost cause. Outstanding Leadership can put a Soldier previously considered a lost cause on the right track. The best advice I can give and this is coming from watching my leaders is not to give up on a Soldier because they have been labeled as a lost cause. When I was a Private I was considered a lost cause and did not like the treatment I received from some of my leaders at the time because of it but I also had a couple of NCOs who never gave up on me. NCOs who pushed me. NCOs who eventually wanted to see me put on those stripes and become a NCO. Now I have never put on stripes mainly because I never got my points up but that is not to say I have not tried to learn from my leaders and help out my fellow Soldiers. Some Soldiers require a bit more leadership than others. Some come into the military with that hard charge mentality. They are going to do whats asked and get it done fast. I guess what I am getting at is that all Soldiers have potential to be great no one thing determines what their potential is. Until the day those Soldiers PCS/ETS out of the Army and no longer are under your leadership you should always strive to set them up for success. You can lead a Horse to water but you cannot force it to drink. If you provide all your Soldiers with the resources they need to succeed, regardless of what you think of them personally, you have done your part. At the end of the day if you feel you have done everything you could and provide the Soldier with all the resources and guidance they need to succeed you have done your job. But Soldiers who go above and beyond do deserve that 3/4 day pass as opposed to those who just skate by. Seeing my fellow Soldiers get to do things like that while I was left behind made me realize that they must be doing something I wasn't and I started changing the way I did things. Continue to Lead from the front SGT.

The only bad thing about fair and impartial is most commands want it fast and that has the potential to create error. I have yet to see a command that didn't play favorites to some extent.

SGT Aldana, all I can tell you is to keep trying to solve the puzzle. The solution that works best for me, probably wont work as well for you. The underlying formula that runs through all of these responses should only be used as the foundation for your trial and error. It's the individual person variable that prevents the "one size fits all" answer. You'll get it so long as you don't give up.

I go out on that limb up to a point. I can't afford to devote so much time to one Soldier, NCO or Drill Sergeant that the rest of the unit suffers. Experience tells me that cruel as it is, you might be doing that Soldier, NCO or Drill Sergeant a favor by recommending a change of scenery - as in out of the Army and into the civilian world.

Every Soldier deserves the attention and diligence of their NCO. I preach this; I practice it. Not every Soldier is cut out to be the next Sergeant Major of the Army, but one of them is. Is it one of your Soldiers right now?
How will he/she view your leadership down the road when they have Soldiers?
Are you a leader they will respect enough to use your techniques someday when they have Soldiers?

Some of your Soldiers, right now are not cut out for the military service. They will do their best - or not - but it is the job of the NCO to get the most out of each and every member of the team. You never know when you'll have to deploy and you will have to relay on your "needy" Soldier with your life.
Train them and motivate them like your life depends on it. It just might.
When they fall short of the standard, it is our job to motivate them. If you can't do that or they really are a lost cause, support them through the transition process. You never know when that Private becomes a boss someday.
The biggest compliment I ever got was from a Soldier who had been out for years, calling me out of the blue to ask for a reference. He had very kind things to say to me about how big an influence I was on him. I wasn't easy on him by any means, but he RESPECTED me.
You will never win them all; sometimes the Army gives you snake eyes. But do your best when you have the awesome responsibility to lead. It will come back to you someday.

based on what you wrote.. i do the same thing... but at the same time... those soldiers that our stagnat sometimes need that push from a NCO to push their drive...

It is possible (and desirable) to impartially reward superior performance and correct poor performance regardless of race, creed, ethnic origin, etc.