12
12
0
I have been asked before about what PTSD is and how it affects me. This is me taken at my lowest moments. It is how I feel most days. How would you describe it?
PTSD
Mental Health
Readiness
Posted 9 y ago
Responses: 14
7
7
0
My PTSD is like a nightmare that won't go away that hunts me by the sound of a school tornado drill.I can't be in crowded and when I leave my house I feel like every move I make is tactical.But one day I'm going to cross out my PTSD like tic-tac-toe.
(7)
(0)
CSM Richard Welsch
Since we are talking about PTSD- Does anyone get night every night and wake up at in sweat pissed off to the point where you jump in the shower can does not go back to sleep out of fear?
(1)
(0)
SSgt Terry P.
CSM Richard Welsch - The soaked sheets and waking angry is still with me. I have learned to avoid people on these days as much as possible.
(0)
(0)
4
4
0
The problem with PTSD SFC Joseph James is many of us have it and suffer from it, but too many others fake it and pretend they have it... which trivializes it for all of us.
(4)
(0)
(1)
(0)
SFC (Join to see)
SFC Joseph James - you don't. Each case is different. Though you all suffer from it, you can't explain why you feel like you do and you try to rationalize this behavior and or symptoms. When you reach try and reach out to those who say just look in the mirror and tell yourself today's a good day! Nine times out of ten your going to go back to sleep because you just forced yourself to fight a losing battle.
From my observations of ptsd it has more to do with the loss of structure, discipline and blood brother bond once you get out. We are predators, war isn't what kills us! It's coming home to the chaos of civilian living. Trying to live in a single family home when you've depended on a unit for so long. You knew your battle buddy had your six. But the civilian world is nothing but chaos, no structure, no respect and certainly no family bonds.
That's why, in my opinion and what I've dealt with. I'd vets with ptsd, prefer to homeless because it's an opportunity to some how bond together again and fight the war inside each other. Homeless shelters are like bunkers, you sleep in tight courters , you eat in one chow place and during the day they do there own thing. They find unity where they can.
SFC William Stephens A. Jr.,
From my observations of ptsd it has more to do with the loss of structure, discipline and blood brother bond once you get out. We are predators, war isn't what kills us! It's coming home to the chaos of civilian living. Trying to live in a single family home when you've depended on a unit for so long. You knew your battle buddy had your six. But the civilian world is nothing but chaos, no structure, no respect and certainly no family bonds.
That's why, in my opinion and what I've dealt with. I'd vets with ptsd, prefer to homeless because it's an opportunity to some how bond together again and fight the war inside each other. Homeless shelters are like bunkers, you sleep in tight courters , you eat in one chow place and during the day they do there own thing. They find unity where they can.
SFC William Stephens A. Jr.,
(1)
(0)
4
4
0
It is hard to explain
But my version is being trying to be comfortable with things that give normal people nightmares
But my version is being trying to be comfortable with things that give normal people nightmares
(4)
(0)
3
3
0
Hyper vigilant, tense, anticipation of bad things are going to happen, mild to severe panic attack. Mine is mostly anxiety but then there is an emotional aspect too. Once my anxiety licks me, it puts me in depression, little to no motivation, lost self-confidence, pretty much the whole gammit, I do also have physical symptoms as I have complex ptsd, probably partly or mostly why I had 10 different vertebrae out and tachycardia. Its miserable pain and anxiety that I'm anticipating going into cardiac arrest. I am getting adjusted and following up with Doc. At this point I have been adjusted 3 times in the past week and my back went out all 3 times now. Tylenol is not even touching the pain.
(3)
(0)
SSgt Terry P.
Stephanie Jones The sword has been over my head for over 45 years and still flashes often,panic attacks have become less frequent,but the anxiety never goes away.
(2)
(0)
Stephanie Jones
SSgt Terry P. - It doesn't. On that note, I also have flashbacks and nightmares on occasion. 34 years here.
(2)
(0)
3
3
0
(0)
(0)
Capt Tom Brown
SP5 Christine Conley - I would like to remain at least partially mentally or physically active and be able to think or focus on 'other things'. During periods of quiet and solitude I often find bad thoughts and tapes keep reappearing in my mind and running over and over. This happens subconsciously during sleep when bad dreams appear and build up to a point where I, and others, wake in a sweat, angry, agitated and upset.
(1)
(0)
2
2
0
you wake up in the middle of the night heart is pounding, covered in sweet, and don't know why, you go to places and the first thing you do is scope it out look for easy exit and keep a wall to your back, you avoid large crowds and closed spaces, being alone is more comfortable than being social, in the end all you think about is I want my old self back
(2)
(0)
2
2
0
SFC Joseph James I describe PTSD as sneaky--it will steal your life away and you won't understand why.Most people do not react the way you do to the average situation,so you become an outsider,you handle everything from a different standpoint than the average and when the crisis is past you are physically ill for sometime.I lived a life of solitude ,alone most of the time to avoid conflicts and survive what most call "normal everyday living."
(2)
(0)
SSG Daniel Durepo
I don't really consider it living any more. Just getting by. Hiding in the house, I have two friends left and they both know to call before coming over, otherwise I won't open the door.
(1)
(0)
MSG (Join to see)
SSG Daniel Durepo - I have 2 safe places my home and my work place, I have a few friends they check on me by phone or social media, only those that are close enough come over 2 not including family but they also know to call first, the loneliness is pain full at times, its very hard to let somebody get close to me for the fear that they will walk away not understanding why I am what I am
(2)
(0)
2
2
0
It is like hearing this poem and laughing because it makes so much sense...
As I awoke one morning,
When all sweet things are born,
A robin perched upon my sill,
To welcome the coming morn.
He whistled a song so sweetly,
And so softly did he sing,
That thoughts of joy and happiness
To my heart did he bring.
As he cocked his little head,
And paused for a moments lull,
I quickly closed the window,
And crushed his fucking skull.
As I awoke one morning,
When all sweet things are born,
A robin perched upon my sill,
To welcome the coming morn.
He whistled a song so sweetly,
And so softly did he sing,
That thoughts of joy and happiness
To my heart did he bring.
As he cocked his little head,
And paused for a moments lull,
I quickly closed the window,
And crushed his fucking skull.
(2)
(0)
1
1
0
Anyone can get it.
I avoided getting help for it for over a year b/c of the negative stigma that many people give us without knowing much about us. I've met some people I could have become really good friends with or even dated, but she and they have their minds set about us. Once they voice that they 'hate' the military, they either walk away or stop responding. Knowing that many people view me this way is disheartening. Not as bad as Korea of course, but it still exists.
I saw a lot of things I thought I'd never see in my life. Many good, many bad. I won't go into specifics. Each person responds to everything around them in their own way. How we cope is unique itself. The first time I was shot at, I was angry more than anything. Luckily, our gunner (with a .50 cal) took them out. Being a Medic, my job isn't to be Chuck Norris or Rambo. My job is to help: illness, injury, hunger, thirst, emotional, etc. I did for our soldiers and the locals. I saw the poor state that so many were in, while the 'elite' enjoyed their prosperity. I saw their own people hurt and kill them; simply b/c we were helping. I saw friends get killed and was in the Aid Station when some were brought in. Making a list of all their on-person items is not something I'd wish on Hitler.
I've been in a HMVEE when it got hit by an IED. Luckily, poorly made an only one soldier in another vehicle was injured (minor). I've lost my hearing, almost completely for around 3 days in various times. Adrenaline can help process only for a short while. When I moved back home and finally got help, I was an emotional wreck, mostly anger. Three people at the VA near me have done more for me as far as processing 'things'. That was maybe 2012 or so.
I will say: talk to someone. Even if they don't know what to say, the can LISTEN. Get help. Have patience. Drugs may be suggested, but in my experience, they can (not always) help. How one, overcomes and maybe lives with PTSD is different. I know they have service dogs now. Me? An app called Relaxing Melodies (Android and iOS) for sleep and naps and certain songs/melodies along with relaxation techniques. YES, it sounds all fake and not realistic, but it WORKS. I did group therapy with other fellow veterans with PTSD. Eventually, you/they will get to a breaking point where you want help.
I avoided getting help for it for over a year b/c of the negative stigma that many people give us without knowing much about us. I've met some people I could have become really good friends with or even dated, but she and they have their minds set about us. Once they voice that they 'hate' the military, they either walk away or stop responding. Knowing that many people view me this way is disheartening. Not as bad as Korea of course, but it still exists.
I saw a lot of things I thought I'd never see in my life. Many good, many bad. I won't go into specifics. Each person responds to everything around them in their own way. How we cope is unique itself. The first time I was shot at, I was angry more than anything. Luckily, our gunner (with a .50 cal) took them out. Being a Medic, my job isn't to be Chuck Norris or Rambo. My job is to help: illness, injury, hunger, thirst, emotional, etc. I did for our soldiers and the locals. I saw the poor state that so many were in, while the 'elite' enjoyed their prosperity. I saw their own people hurt and kill them; simply b/c we were helping. I saw friends get killed and was in the Aid Station when some were brought in. Making a list of all their on-person items is not something I'd wish on Hitler.
I've been in a HMVEE when it got hit by an IED. Luckily, poorly made an only one soldier in another vehicle was injured (minor). I've lost my hearing, almost completely for around 3 days in various times. Adrenaline can help process only for a short while. When I moved back home and finally got help, I was an emotional wreck, mostly anger. Three people at the VA near me have done more for me as far as processing 'things'. That was maybe 2012 or so.
I will say: talk to someone. Even if they don't know what to say, the can LISTEN. Get help. Have patience. Drugs may be suggested, but in my experience, they can (not always) help. How one, overcomes and maybe lives with PTSD is different. I know they have service dogs now. Me? An app called Relaxing Melodies (Android and iOS) for sleep and naps and certain songs/melodies along with relaxation techniques. YES, it sounds all fake and not realistic, but it WORKS. I did group therapy with other fellow veterans with PTSD. Eventually, you/they will get to a breaking point where you want help.
(1)
(0)
1
1
0
Moral Injury, Invisible Injury, Cost of War, Cognitive Dissonance as opposed to Cognitive Consistency. See "Milgram Experiment". I can't commit suicide it's against my Catholic up-bringing. In fact, my Faith teaches me practice, preach and even martyr to spread the message of Peace. So I do. Amidst the conflict within and without me. I strive to pluck enough nonviolent courage to act with empathy, compassion, mercy, . . .
until . . .
until . . .
(1)
(0)
Read This Next
Continue with Facebook 
Continue with Google