Posted on Feb 14, 2015
What are some the pitfalls you encountered when you retired from the military?
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I remember retiring from the military and entering the civilian workforce and using the military style leadership, please don't do it, it doesn't work. The "you will do" attitude creates problems. You must learn to be more polished, this was my pitfall.
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Posted 11 y ago
Responses: 11
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Even on active duty I never had the "You will do" attitude. I always used the "do me a favor" style and it always worked for me.
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SSG Adam Reed
I agree with Boots. I used the same leadership style. It worked and had very little kickback. Plus I did jobs that sucked and the troops saw me doing them. Which intern earned me some respect from them. Quick story......We had a SSG who was ex-Marine trying to implement the Marine style into our Army Reserve unit. He was a squad leader as was I. During one drill weekend one of his troops came to me and admitted he was thinking of suicide. I quickly got him away from the troops and talked to him in private with the Detachment Senior NCO. As we are doing this the ex Marine walks by and looks in the door and sees us talking to him. He instantly goes ape shit. I take the ex Marine into the hallway and, well lets say he never used his style in front of me again.
We have to remember, everyone is human and everyone is different. But if you treat them all with human dignity they will out perform for you.
We have to remember, everyone is human and everyone is different. But if you treat them all with human dignity they will out perform for you.
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SFC Walt Littleton
I always used the team approach, this is what needs to happen lets go get it. Most of my time I was in charge of multiple MOS's and that base narrowed down who did what. If any of our team were backed we always backed each other up. Yes, absolutely I lead and worked. Never asked my soldier to do anything I wouldn't and usually I was right there with them.
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SFC Boots Attaway
SSG Adam Reed , SFC Walt Littleton , I agree with you both. NEVER ask anyone under you to do something that you yourself would not do and treat everyone with respect.
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My biggest pitfall was not weighing all the options or knowing all the facts. Then realizing after the retirement that I should have stayed in.
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GySgt (Join to see)
Hear Hear! Completely agree. Grass isn't always greener . . . . lots of brown patches out here.
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SFC Boots Attaway
SSG Adam Reed , that is one reason that after being out for 20+ years I joined the National Guard in 07. Unfortunately I got injured in 08 and they retired me in 13. I still wish I was in.
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1. Cultural change; still adapting (NOT) after 16 years
2. Sense of purpose; many civilians are money driven instead of mission oriented
3. Missing camaraderie; nothing compares to my experiences in the Corps
4. Missing the adventure; I guess I took the experiences for granted. Some sucked, but all were way better than 9-5 in a cubicle. LOL
5. I'd trade the "political" nature of the current Corps over civilian politics any day. For the active folks, just you wait! :)
6. All the other points that other retirees are pointing out
And like one of the brethren already stated, I wasn't fully informed (my fault) when I retired -- I should have stayed in till they kicked me out.
I am successful and am thankful for that, but I was a happy camper back when I was a Staff Sergeant and my wife and I lived at Lejeune or DC hanging out with our military friends and spouses. Folks, don't take your military family for granted!
2. Sense of purpose; many civilians are money driven instead of mission oriented
3. Missing camaraderie; nothing compares to my experiences in the Corps
4. Missing the adventure; I guess I took the experiences for granted. Some sucked, but all were way better than 9-5 in a cubicle. LOL
5. I'd trade the "political" nature of the current Corps over civilian politics any day. For the active folks, just you wait! :)
6. All the other points that other retirees are pointing out
And like one of the brethren already stated, I wasn't fully informed (my fault) when I retired -- I should have stayed in till they kicked me out.
I am successful and am thankful for that, but I was a happy camper back when I was a Staff Sergeant and my wife and I lived at Lejeune or DC hanging out with our military friends and spouses. Folks, don't take your military family for granted!
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My biggest pitfall: I don't know how to be a civilian.
It's been almost 10 years and I still have not adjusted.
I think a career as a cop and part time ANG would do me some good.
Another pitfall is finding the patience to have a conversation with a civilian about combat.
It's been almost 10 years and I still have not adjusted.
I think a career as a cop and part time ANG would do me some good.
Another pitfall is finding the patience to have a conversation with a civilian about combat.
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MAJ David Vermillion
I think some civilians have a glorified view of combat situations and want to hear things that should be private. I know I don't tell all.
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CPT (Join to see)
SPC Brent Morrison - Even the noncombat side strains conversation with civilians. I get so angry with people crying like a baby about having to take a patient at work, or whining because someone asked them for help and they were trying to check their email, or how early they have to get up. Having dealt with people and watched those that are struggling...having to tell Soldiers that they have to choose between a 6 figure surgery/recovery with a military paycheck or seeing their families. It sucks.
I think also, people are desensitized to violence as a result of the media. People don't understand the effect that pulling a trigger with a human being on the receiving end of the bullet has major psychological consequences...and even living with the threat of being killed on a daily basis also changes people dramatically. These are things that people can't relate to, because they have tried. I think they envision it being as the "Band of Brothers", fighting alongside each other...without understanding the ramifications that come from that. They try to see the positives, but since they don't grasp the process, they don't understand that there are negatives that come with it.
v/r,
CPT Butler
I think also, people are desensitized to violence as a result of the media. People don't understand the effect that pulling a trigger with a human being on the receiving end of the bullet has major psychological consequences...and even living with the threat of being killed on a daily basis also changes people dramatically. These are things that people can't relate to, because they have tried. I think they envision it being as the "Band of Brothers", fighting alongside each other...without understanding the ramifications that come from that. They try to see the positives, but since they don't grasp the process, they don't understand that there are negatives that come with it.
v/r,
CPT Butler
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Y'all have to give me a little leeway here. I didn't really retire. I only spent a little over 5 years on active duty. More than a simple enlistment. Less than a military career. Still, I seem to have faced many of the problems that I hear military retirees complaining of.
My peers who didn't serve (or served minimally) established their civilian careers while I was away.
I was mission-oriented while they were more time-oriented. That is, they believed they were selling their time for a wage whereas I was focused on accomplishing something without regard for the clock.
They focused on management style while I focused on leadership style.
I discovered that I was far better as a planner than most civilians. It was funny watching civilians attempting to learn project management techniques that were designed and practiced routinely in the service. Sit down with a copy of PMBOK - the civilian guide to project management.
In the end, the same problems that bedeviled me in the Army haunted me in civilian life and I was tossed from jobs even more quickly than I was tossed out of the Army.
Ultimately, I found my place among entrepreneurs. To be honest, I feel that most military personnel would succeed better as entrepreneurs than as employees.
My peers who didn't serve (or served minimally) established their civilian careers while I was away.
I was mission-oriented while they were more time-oriented. That is, they believed they were selling their time for a wage whereas I was focused on accomplishing something without regard for the clock.
They focused on management style while I focused on leadership style.
I discovered that I was far better as a planner than most civilians. It was funny watching civilians attempting to learn project management techniques that were designed and practiced routinely in the service. Sit down with a copy of PMBOK - the civilian guide to project management.
In the end, the same problems that bedeviled me in the Army haunted me in civilian life and I was tossed from jobs even more quickly than I was tossed out of the Army.
Ultimately, I found my place among entrepreneurs. To be honest, I feel that most military personnel would succeed better as entrepreneurs than as employees.
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My biggest pitfall had to do with taxes. I didn't plan on the tax hit I was going to take going from active duty (with all that tax-free money, like BAH) to a civilian job. At the end of my first year after retirement, I wound up owing Uncle Sam almost $10,000.
Maybe that's not a pitfall exactly. Definitely a lesson learned. I paid off that debt and adjusted the amount of federal tax being taken out of my pay so that would never happen again.
Maybe that's not a pitfall exactly. Definitely a lesson learned. I paid off that debt and adjusted the amount of federal tax being taken out of my pay so that would never happen again.
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MAJ David Vermillion
Sounds like a shocking pitfall, I am glad to hear you were able to deal with it and resolve the issue before it got out of hand. Thanks for sharing.
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Suspended Profile
Deciding what to wear to work every day is a huge culture shock. So is the unregimented lifestyle. It's very hard to transition to being a civilian after over 20 years in uniform. So you have to rethink everything and learn completely new ways of doing things...
Suspended Profile
CW5 - nice "throwback" photo...
CW5 (Join to see)
Thanks, LCDR Jaron Matlow. The picture is from when I entered active duty - almost 40 years ago, June 1975.
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Trying to get the VA to acknowledge the medical issues that were found while I was on active duty and aggravated on deployments.
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MAJ David Vermillion
I hope you have been successful in getting your issues resolved. I know the VA is difficult to deal with at times especially with all the stories you about them. Keep pressing onward.
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Suspended Profile
Master Chief, if you're still having problems, please contact me off line. I'm an expert at VA disability issues...
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Trying to be able to translate your military experiences into something a civilian employer could understand.
Thankfully, I was hired by an employer who is also a military veteran.
Thankfully, I was hired by an employer who is also a military veteran.
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A lot of military retirees tell me that a GS level is not equivalent to a rank in the military. For example, a GS-4 doesn't "out-rank" a GS-3. Of course, it is a different story if you are a supervisor or something along that reason.
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Unfortunately in the newer ARMY you cannot use the "you will do" attitude anymore MAJ David Vermillion.
The Soldiers are too sensitive and we are expected to handle things in a different manner.
I do look forward to what this post brings from the community.
The Soldiers are too sensitive and we are expected to handle things in a different manner.
I do look forward to what this post brings from the community.
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SFC (Join to see)
CPT (Join to see) That's what I was explained to before I chose to have my PRK done about 8 years ago. I will look into it. This came from your writing " MSG that felt she was entitled to a boob job on Army dime". I would assume breast augmentation is an elective surgery.
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SFC (Join to see)
Elective cosmetic surgery is not a TRICARE covered benefit.
Source: http://www.tricare.mil/ocfo/_docs/CSE%207%200%20User%20Guide%2001Jul%202011%20R1.pdf
Source: http://www.tricare.mil/ocfo/_docs/CSE%207%200%20User%20Guide%2001Jul%202011%20R1.pdf
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CPT (Join to see)
Ooohhh....that explains it. And yes, she is authorized to have it done (may have coverage/copay requirements). However, she is not authorized to remain on orders and get PAID for having it done as a mobilized Reserve/NG troop. That program is meant for people that are wounded while on orders and are incapable of working.
v/r,
CPT Butler
v/r,
CPT Butler
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PO1 John Meyer, CPC
That's like one of my CO's used to say.... We (referring to the military) are a direct reflection of our society.
What a reflection, no?
What a reflection, no?
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