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As leaders, we should automatically respect our subordinates at all times. There is a stark difference between leadership and dictatorship. As soon as the leaders in the military figure this out, they will notice a peak in the retention rate of their Soldiers.
I have communicated with over 300 Soldiers who are eligible to extend their enlistment contract within the past few months and was shocked to hear the responses from some of them. One Soldier mentioned, “I would remain in the military but cannot understand why I’m getting cursed out when asked to do something. I am a grown man!” I asked this same Soldier if he’d discuss with his leaders the disrespect he feels and he said that he had spoken with them about it. My final question to him was, “So what did they say?” He replied, “They said that I am a Soldier and if I can’t handle it, get out!”
As a leader myself, I apologized to this Soldier and informed him that some leaders are called leaders because of their position or title, not because of their leadership. I then annotated in the retention book that he was not going to extend his contract but instead, leave the military because of the disrespect from his leadership.
Must a Soldier be a Chaplain to get respected? Can a Soldier who informs his or her chain of command that the speaking of profanity is against their religion be provided the same respect that a chaplain receives? Should fellow Soldiers respect these Soldiers? To me, the answer is quite simple. We should.
I am one of these Soldiers. I am a non-paid minister at a local church. The Soldiers who are aware of this duty respect the fact I am a Soldier and a minister. I've expressed to others that I would like for them to be themselves while in my presence, as I would perceive unrealism if they would change their talk, speech, or attitude just because I was standing around in the vicinity. Some disagreed but others said okay and would use profanity as if I’m not around. It didn’t then and doesn’t bother me a bit. However, there might be Soldiers that are affected by vulgar and demeaning language and I believe this should be respected.
If smoking a cigarette around a non-smoker is a sign of disrespect, I believe using profanity around a non-profanity speaker falls within the same guidelines if the Soldier speaks up. Leaders must understand that profanity can be damning to a lot of people. The “F” word has been known to cause havoc, begin fights, and unfortunately result in someone being killed. To tell a Soldier to deal with the disrespect because you're a Soldier is unacceptable.
This is not a new Army. Respect began when the Army began.
I have communicated with over 300 Soldiers who are eligible to extend their enlistment contract within the past few months and was shocked to hear the responses from some of them. One Soldier mentioned, “I would remain in the military but cannot understand why I’m getting cursed out when asked to do something. I am a grown man!” I asked this same Soldier if he’d discuss with his leaders the disrespect he feels and he said that he had spoken with them about it. My final question to him was, “So what did they say?” He replied, “They said that I am a Soldier and if I can’t handle it, get out!”
As a leader myself, I apologized to this Soldier and informed him that some leaders are called leaders because of their position or title, not because of their leadership. I then annotated in the retention book that he was not going to extend his contract but instead, leave the military because of the disrespect from his leadership.
Must a Soldier be a Chaplain to get respected? Can a Soldier who informs his or her chain of command that the speaking of profanity is against their religion be provided the same respect that a chaplain receives? Should fellow Soldiers respect these Soldiers? To me, the answer is quite simple. We should.
I am one of these Soldiers. I am a non-paid minister at a local church. The Soldiers who are aware of this duty respect the fact I am a Soldier and a minister. I've expressed to others that I would like for them to be themselves while in my presence, as I would perceive unrealism if they would change their talk, speech, or attitude just because I was standing around in the vicinity. Some disagreed but others said okay and would use profanity as if I’m not around. It didn’t then and doesn’t bother me a bit. However, there might be Soldiers that are affected by vulgar and demeaning language and I believe this should be respected.
If smoking a cigarette around a non-smoker is a sign of disrespect, I believe using profanity around a non-profanity speaker falls within the same guidelines if the Soldier speaks up. Leaders must understand that profanity can be damning to a lot of people. The “F” word has been known to cause havoc, begin fights, and unfortunately result in someone being killed. To tell a Soldier to deal with the disrespect because you're a Soldier is unacceptable.
This is not a new Army. Respect began when the Army began.
Religion
Respect
Values
Command Post
Edited >1 y ago
Posted >1 y ago
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MSG, I couldn't agree more. I have a favorite quote that I often use. I tell young Soldiers to expect and demand great leadership. Then I'll add “There’s a great deal of talk about loyalty from the bottom to the top. Loyalty from the top down is even more necessary and is much less prevalent. One of the most frequently noted characteristics of great men who have remained great is loyalty to their subordinates.”
- General George Patton Jr
Leaders need to respect their subordinates if they want respect in return.
- General George Patton Jr
Leaders need to respect their subordinates if they want respect in return.
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I can handle a little profanity but when a Superior begins an ass chewing with " you stupid F--kers are gonna pay, its ears of
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I always told my guys that respect is earned and that they never had to show any respect to anybody; however courtesy should always be shown to everybody at all times, and the courtesies cannot be lost. Respect is a feeling, and not action; courtesy on the other hand is manner of conduct. When I salute an officer it was not out of respect it was out of courtesy, and their return was (Even if it had a coffee cup, cigarette, pen, or other crap that they happened to have in their hand) a courtesy because they didn't know me, and to expect them to have some respect for me was impractical, and untrue.
I think that I was not always courteous to my Marines as I should have been, and would do things differently now. I did however respect them.
I think that I was not always courteous to my Marines as I should have been, and would do things differently now. I did however respect them.
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MSG (Join to see)
CPL Rice, since you were a member of another branch, I'm not going to quote you the Army Values. I'm quite sure that the Marines had a certain code or value system that had the word respect in it somewhere. It's difficult for me to believe that the Marines are taught to never show any respect to anybody. Your last statement summed it up for me. It's all about respect and you said that you respected your guys.
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Cpl Chris Rice
Honor, Courage, Commitment: The word respect is not specifically mentioned, but for the 19 year old who just got screwed by some POS SSgt, helping them see the difference between respect and courtesy helped them to stay out of trouble and hold their tongues when needed. The Marine Corps taught it with the word respect, but if I do not know you, or understand your rank I cannot respect either of them, I will out of obedience to orders show them courtesy.
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MSG (Join to see) MSG, this is a great article which focuses on leadership and the message I received was derogatory leadership (while perhaps a style, even though not a good one) is still used in our professional military realm. That said, there is a time and a place for most things, but a lack of respect in any organization which is built and prides itself on respect is intolerable. Leadership is effecting change. If you as a leader are only able to effect change through yelling and use of profanity, perhaps you should re-visit your leader roots, regroup, and try again. Grant it, I have the foulest mouth of anyone, but I respect the persons around me and rarely use profanity in a setting where I do not know my audience will accept it.
Respect is reciprocal, the more I give, then more I receive. While I expect a new Soldier assigned to me to respect the stripes I wear, I also know through time, effort, and energy that Soldier will grow to respect me because of my professionalism, character, dedication to duty, and leadership. Ultimately for me, leadership was always summed up as "when we succeed the credit goes to the Soldiers, if we fail the responsibility rests with me."
Thank you for this interesting article and for bringing it up in this forum. (Oh and please tell SFC Ann Timmins hello for me)
SFC Joseph M. Finck USA (Ret)
Respect is reciprocal, the more I give, then more I receive. While I expect a new Soldier assigned to me to respect the stripes I wear, I also know through time, effort, and energy that Soldier will grow to respect me because of my professionalism, character, dedication to duty, and leadership. Ultimately for me, leadership was always summed up as "when we succeed the credit goes to the Soldiers, if we fail the responsibility rests with me."
Thank you for this interesting article and for bringing it up in this forum. (Oh and please tell SFC Ann Timmins hello for me)
SFC Joseph M. Finck USA (Ret)
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I'm 100% certain that those claiming profanity at work offends them also do not watch movies or listen to music with any profanity in them whatsoever...right?
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MSG (Join to see)
SSG Wiley, I think you're missing the main point. Profanity isn't the issue. I watch movies and tv shows with profanity in them but none of the profanity is directed towards me. There's a difference. If I say FU SGT it's one thing. If I said that's some F Up'd stuff it's another.
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SSG Jacob Wiley
MSG: tracking. That was more in response to just the few I very briefly glanced over that referenced profanity.
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I NEVER told my soldiers to do something, instead I asked them to do it and often said please. I never had to EXPLAIN why they should do it and not someone else and feel that my soldiers and soldiers in other squads and platoons respected me more than NCOs that TOLD them.
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SFC Nestor Nievesmoran
There are moments for reward as there are moments for punishment with that in mind, respect goes a long way. First we need to understand what is respect. Respect is an Army value that is required for everyone to lived up too. it is treating others as we will like to be treated, it is what allows us to see the best on others... it is important to respect because it builds trust. I will have to disagree with some of the comments, respect is not asking please to accomplish a mission, there are many situations that there is no room for please. I will not ask a Soldier to please place fires on the objective or to jump out of an aircraft in flight. Asking please is just a polite way to do things while respect is ensuring you care of others doing what is expected from you and not demanding what others can not accomplish. There are times to be polite and there is time to place a boot in someone behind, I guarantee that regardless which one, others will respect you for who you are and not for how polite you can be. "Suck it up and drive on and I will lead our way home"
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Basic training requires a particular method of Leadership to build and tear down the enlistee, through out the training cycle this promotes team building and survival afterwards. We as their leaders are tasked with an insurmountable responsibility, to these young people and profanities isn't a set standard we promulgate as the norm! When you get out of basic things become a little less hectic, now you go on to continue further training and your leaders are not to exhibit dictator type behavior! That would blatantly be in violation of the UCMJ and code of conduct as a senior NCO, and taken to the command senior enlisted for resolution. Come on ladies /gentleman as leaders you set the standard by leading by example not through ignorance, if you've lost touch in how to be an effective leader step down and or retire!
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This is for everyone; and my take, if you are using cursing as a part of your everyday speaking then I can tell you; you wont last in the civilian world. I have heard a lot of cursing in my days of the marines and it is not affective in getting someone to do something. if you are an grown man or women, no one should have to curs at you to do the right thing. and people this may sound like it is a good thing to do while in uniform today. but what happens when you have to at some point hang your uniform up and make that great transition over to civilian life. some people that I have ran into are having problems finding work today because of their mouth. we are living in an super sensitive world and if you go onto a job and use words from the military talking to civilians of younger age and older who do not understand you; you wont be working long. all I am saying is be careful of how you use your words.
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SCPO Larry Knight Sr.
Good on you SSgt, would proudly serve along side you in any situation, and agree with you 100%.
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I actually greatly appreciate this idea. I am a chaplain candidate presently, so I'm in that class of Soldiers that, traditionally, other Soldiers are less likely to swear around. But other members of my church don't swear, either, as a rule.
Aside from that, it is much more professional not to swear. Just as we have a clean haircut and shave, keep our uniforms in good condition, and render proper courtesies to others, profanity has a very real impact on our professionalism and our professional appearance.
Can I 'deal' with profanity? Sure. I've had more than enough exposure to know that I can 'deal' with it. But it still bothers me a little, deep down. I think your comparison to cigarette smoke is apt—I believe profanity has an analogous, harmful effect on me as well, so when appropriate I try to excuse myself from situations where profanity is particularly excessive.
But I could see this being a reason why some very capable Soldiers may choose not to continue with our organization. It's at least enough to think twice about instead of responding with the ever-inspiring "IT'S THE ARMY, DEAL WITH IT!" Adapting to others' needs is not always a weakness, sometimes it's the best and the smartest thing you can do.
Aside from that, it is much more professional not to swear. Just as we have a clean haircut and shave, keep our uniforms in good condition, and render proper courtesies to others, profanity has a very real impact on our professionalism and our professional appearance.
Can I 'deal' with profanity? Sure. I've had more than enough exposure to know that I can 'deal' with it. But it still bothers me a little, deep down. I think your comparison to cigarette smoke is apt—I believe profanity has an analogous, harmful effect on me as well, so when appropriate I try to excuse myself from situations where profanity is particularly excessive.
But I could see this being a reason why some very capable Soldiers may choose not to continue with our organization. It's at least enough to think twice about instead of responding with the ever-inspiring "IT'S THE ARMY, DEAL WITH IT!" Adapting to others' needs is not always a weakness, sometimes it's the best and the smartest thing you can do.
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