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Post Traumatic Stress is the body’s natural response to critical life incidents, affecting each of us to varying degrees and in different ways physically, emotionally, cognitively, and spiritually. Within the VA, PTS is generally ranked by severity somewhere between one and ten. Anyone who has survived a fire, flood, hurricane, tornado, shipwreck, rape, or any sort of life-threatening incident never forgets what happened. PTS is our reaction to traumatic or unpleasant incidents or chapters of our lives. Symptoms include nightmares, flashbacks, loss of sleep, irritability, short temperedness, loss of concentration, hostility, weight gain, loss of self-worth, anxiety, and survivor's guilt.
During the post-Vietnam War period when the term Post Traumatic Stress Disorder replaced the old school WWI term “shell-shock” and the WWII term “battle-fatigue.” The VA tends to take a clinical approach to Post Traumatic Stress and continues to call it a disorder (PTSD). PTS is not a disorder in my opinion, but a natural response to trauma we experience. Most veterans agree that there is a negative connotation to calling this reaction a disorder - it suggests there is something wrong with them. Truthfully, what we are responding to is natural. Post Trauma Stress should be universally considered an injury (PTSI) rather than a disorder. Sometimes people never fully recover, but that doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with them. Just like any other injury, even if it’s not possible to get back to 100%, there are many methods to get people back to living a mostly normal life.
Although I’m a non-combat Vietnam era vet, I have many friends who saw combat in that war or are combat veterans of the conflicts in the Middle East. They all returned home wanting to put the experience behind them and, with only a few exceptions, most are not comfortable talking about their experiences. Many returned home with a newfound addiction to drugs and/or alcohol. Generally they received little help from anyone, including the VA.
Over the course of time, and many cups of coffee, a good friend of mine provided me some insight and understanding of PTSI, based on his own experience and what he has learned about himself as a Vietnam Army Combat Veteran. His wife encouraged him to write down his experiences while in Vietnam, and the result was a piece called, “Through My Eyes” chronicling his tour of duty in Vietnam 1968 - 1969. It was the beginning of his recovery process from PTSI. He has attended a number of Veterans’ Camp gatherings as both a participant and advisor. Though he still suffers from PTSI, Bob has learned coping mechanisms to deal with it, and over the past 45 years he has come a long way.
Through our discussions, I learned that many veterans didn’t realize what effect combat had on them until they returned home. It was at home that my friend began to realize that simply getting a good night’s sleep would be a blessing. His attitude and conversations had changed considerably after the war, along with his level of impatience. Most combat vets are hesitant to talk about what happened to them, or read war stories, or watch certain movies because they do not want to reignite memories.
I could never fully comprehend the anguish and fear my friend experienced as a combat Vietnam vet, but I can understand the flashbacks. My own experience with PTS is based on my 32-year marriage to a woman with PTS. Even after 50 years, she still struggles with memories of rape, a car accident, and the loss of our 8-year-old daughter. My friend told me that while he could not comprehend what we went through losing a child, he appreciated knowing how I dealt with it. Many of us agreed that we share a common healer in Jesus, even though most people at a Vet Camp would not appreciate a dialogue that included a lot of Jesus talk.
My friend also discovered that spouses of combat veterans can play an important role in successfully addressing PTS. At one family Vet Camp, he shared his experience speaking with just the spouses. He talked about the emotions, concerns, and fears that their partners would not share with them. They were very appreciative of his willingness to open up and give them a better understanding of the issues their loved ones may be dealing with.
Today we have many combat Iraq and Afghanistan veterans who struggle with similar flashbacks and stress-related issues when they return home and strive to melt back into civilian life. However, PTS also affects our men and women within our community support systems, such as police officers and firefighters, and is recognized as being a key factor in the health and stability of these organizations.
At home, and on any given day, at least 22 veterans take their own lives, typically due to PTS. However this past summer, the Department of Veterans Affairs indicated this number is now closer to 20 veterans committing suicide every day. I personally believe that the most recent statistics on these suicides likely do not consider vets suffering from PTS, who in the past overdosed on drugs or and/or alcohol. Though the exact figures are unknown, any number of military personnel taking their own lives is unacceptable, it is too many.
The universal goal among veterans advocacy groups is to dramatically reduce that number by working with our vets by giving them the knowledge, tools, and resources to understand what PTS is and how to cope with it. Veterans’ Camp, or veteran gatherings, have proven to be a successful means to begin a dialogue.
Nearly all vets with PTS have trust issues to varying degrees. Even amongst themselves, vets may not open up or even realize that their suffering can be helped. The purpose of Vet Camps is to provide a safe place where vets can meet other vets with PTS while learning how best to cope with it. At these camps, we talk about issues that cause them concern, such as a lack of support from the VA. Many others open up about the ugliness of war and the loss of their comrades and friends. Occasionally, discussions revolve around similar topics to what is discussed here on RallyPoint: what our government expects of our military, such as rules of engagement and intelligence failures, and the overall effectiveness of our armed forces.
If you or anyone you know may be suffering from PTS, just remember that it is not a disorder, but an injury, and there are thousands of vets like you who would love to help out.
During the post-Vietnam War period when the term Post Traumatic Stress Disorder replaced the old school WWI term “shell-shock” and the WWII term “battle-fatigue.” The VA tends to take a clinical approach to Post Traumatic Stress and continues to call it a disorder (PTSD). PTS is not a disorder in my opinion, but a natural response to trauma we experience. Most veterans agree that there is a negative connotation to calling this reaction a disorder - it suggests there is something wrong with them. Truthfully, what we are responding to is natural. Post Trauma Stress should be universally considered an injury (PTSI) rather than a disorder. Sometimes people never fully recover, but that doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with them. Just like any other injury, even if it’s not possible to get back to 100%, there are many methods to get people back to living a mostly normal life.
Although I’m a non-combat Vietnam era vet, I have many friends who saw combat in that war or are combat veterans of the conflicts in the Middle East. They all returned home wanting to put the experience behind them and, with only a few exceptions, most are not comfortable talking about their experiences. Many returned home with a newfound addiction to drugs and/or alcohol. Generally they received little help from anyone, including the VA.
Over the course of time, and many cups of coffee, a good friend of mine provided me some insight and understanding of PTSI, based on his own experience and what he has learned about himself as a Vietnam Army Combat Veteran. His wife encouraged him to write down his experiences while in Vietnam, and the result was a piece called, “Through My Eyes” chronicling his tour of duty in Vietnam 1968 - 1969. It was the beginning of his recovery process from PTSI. He has attended a number of Veterans’ Camp gatherings as both a participant and advisor. Though he still suffers from PTSI, Bob has learned coping mechanisms to deal with it, and over the past 45 years he has come a long way.
Through our discussions, I learned that many veterans didn’t realize what effect combat had on them until they returned home. It was at home that my friend began to realize that simply getting a good night’s sleep would be a blessing. His attitude and conversations had changed considerably after the war, along with his level of impatience. Most combat vets are hesitant to talk about what happened to them, or read war stories, or watch certain movies because they do not want to reignite memories.
I could never fully comprehend the anguish and fear my friend experienced as a combat Vietnam vet, but I can understand the flashbacks. My own experience with PTS is based on my 32-year marriage to a woman with PTS. Even after 50 years, she still struggles with memories of rape, a car accident, and the loss of our 8-year-old daughter. My friend told me that while he could not comprehend what we went through losing a child, he appreciated knowing how I dealt with it. Many of us agreed that we share a common healer in Jesus, even though most people at a Vet Camp would not appreciate a dialogue that included a lot of Jesus talk.
My friend also discovered that spouses of combat veterans can play an important role in successfully addressing PTS. At one family Vet Camp, he shared his experience speaking with just the spouses. He talked about the emotions, concerns, and fears that their partners would not share with them. They were very appreciative of his willingness to open up and give them a better understanding of the issues their loved ones may be dealing with.
Today we have many combat Iraq and Afghanistan veterans who struggle with similar flashbacks and stress-related issues when they return home and strive to melt back into civilian life. However, PTS also affects our men and women within our community support systems, such as police officers and firefighters, and is recognized as being a key factor in the health and stability of these organizations.
At home, and on any given day, at least 22 veterans take their own lives, typically due to PTS. However this past summer, the Department of Veterans Affairs indicated this number is now closer to 20 veterans committing suicide every day. I personally believe that the most recent statistics on these suicides likely do not consider vets suffering from PTS, who in the past overdosed on drugs or and/or alcohol. Though the exact figures are unknown, any number of military personnel taking their own lives is unacceptable, it is too many.
The universal goal among veterans advocacy groups is to dramatically reduce that number by working with our vets by giving them the knowledge, tools, and resources to understand what PTS is and how to cope with it. Veterans’ Camp, or veteran gatherings, have proven to be a successful means to begin a dialogue.
Nearly all vets with PTS have trust issues to varying degrees. Even amongst themselves, vets may not open up or even realize that their suffering can be helped. The purpose of Vet Camps is to provide a safe place where vets can meet other vets with PTS while learning how best to cope with it. At these camps, we talk about issues that cause them concern, such as a lack of support from the VA. Many others open up about the ugliness of war and the loss of their comrades and friends. Occasionally, discussions revolve around similar topics to what is discussed here on RallyPoint: what our government expects of our military, such as rules of engagement and intelligence failures, and the overall effectiveness of our armed forces.
If you or anyone you know may be suffering from PTS, just remember that it is not a disorder, but an injury, and there are thousands of vets like you who would love to help out.
PTSD
PTS
Trauma
Mental Health
Command Post
Posted 7 y ago
Responses: 61
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I had PTSD in the USMC and didn't know what it were. All I knew is that I didn't know how to explain what I were feeling. I joined the Police Department and were riding with a partner one day and heard a car backfire, I slammed on brakes in the middle of the intersection, ashamed of what just happen, I play it off as I thought I saw a car coming. Back in the 1970's, a fellow Marine encourage me to go to a Marine Corp Reserve meeting with him. While in formation the Platoon Gunnery Sergeant, back then had a curse word for everything they said, the curse words triggered the PTSD, after formation I ran down the streets, to try to dismiss the things that had happen to me in Infantry. Later I went to a civilian doctor, and then VAMC.
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Love talking with strong bad ass suriviors if you ever need anyone to talk to feel free to msg me I know I've never had combat experience but I've had my trials and times that made me question if I've had civilian ptsd though fully healed I get how annoying to be twenty and feel your dying from a panick attack from a small trigger that bring all the shit back stay strong vets please talk if you need help it's disturbing how many vets America looses to this it's hard but it's harder to do it alone
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I don't think it was taken seriously enough until until post desert storm and desert shield and the period of its being brought out to the public has led to what I believe to be a recognized valid psychological condition by the civilian population is slowing its treatment among us. I also know that its failure to be recognized and the the stigma attached to it played a significant part in my first stepfather's suicide. He was a Marine who served in Korea.
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Thousands of Vietnam-Korea veterans are walking around with PTSD, and don't even know if.They know something is not right,but can't figure it out.If a veteran waits several years after mustering out,to file a claim,it can take years to get the VA's attention.We have veterans applying 40-50 years after the war or conflict. The best they can hope for is a 10-20% rating.I understand the government can't go back and compensate,but be a little more sensitive to the many years of issues this person,family and friends may have suffered with him/ her.
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PO2 Orville Thomas
Keith Thomas PO2. I served as an aircrewman in the Navy for 7 years. In January 1961, after flying a 14-hour reconnaissance mission, our plane crashed on landing. six crewmen were killed and three firefighters were also killed when our aircraft hit the on-station crash truck. Five of the six crewman died within arms length of me. Within two weeks I started having flashbacks. I didn't want to say anything because I was getting ready to re-enlist and didn't want to jeopardise it. I did re-enlist for 6 years but my life went upside down, I couldn't sleep, drinking until I passed out seemed to be the only thing that worked. I was angry all the time, was in several naval mental facilities. I was discharged after 4 years, 2 short of my full enlistment. I received an honorable discharge under an emotional disorder (non-service connected). As a civilian everything got worse, my wife divorced me, I couldn't hold a job and drank incessantly. This lasted until 1979 when I was able to get sober in AA. The drinking was gone but not the flashbacks and sleeplessness. At 72, the VA gave a sleep test for sleep apnea. When the Doctor found out I had nightmares he sent me to mental health. They quickly diagnosed me with PTSD. I received a 30% disability and through several programs I have gotten better. But I am bitter that I lost so much of my life because the Navy missed it and for 30 years the VA missed it. It doesn't just go away without treatment.
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Here's my share on PTSD for you that I took out of my book the "THE MIRROR"
On 31 October 2008, 20 years and 21 days ago, I said my farewell to my family, my career and my love. It was the life I longed for and would never look back on because I was a broken warrior that could not serve my country anymore. After numerous combat missions and peace keeping deployments to the Middle East, my final tour was to start a new chapter in life as a retired veteran and soon to become civilian. I stood on the parade field at Fort Meade, Maryland as the Old Guard retired a few of us. My little girl watched the ceremony in which she can remember today as her father and her superhero say goodbye to the United States ARMY.
I look back today and try to remember my steps from being 19 years old when I left for Desert Shield/Desert Storm, to my final days in Iraq helping the ARMY write for the Center of ARMY Lessons Learned (CALL), and to my last ribbon placed on my uniform for my retirement ceremony. I will never know what my future could have been if I had accepted that 5th combat tour. Where would I be today? Would I be that Command Sergeant Major I always dreamed of being with my peers today? Or would I have died because of getting into a situation I could not have handled due to the PTSD getting so bad.
I believe that I took the right road because I’m here today writing my story and I have a little girl I can share my experiences with so she can pass it down through her generations. Even though there are some who want to forget the nightmares, every day I experience reminders of being in a combat situation or flashbacks of those days. The best thing to do is talk to someone or to write about it.
That brings me to the Warrior Transition Unit at Walter Reed ARMY Medical Center in Wash, DC. Something was just not right when I returned back from Iraq on my last deployment. I wasn’t really there for combat and I didn’t feel safe either because we didn’t have much protection while we were there. The leadership was more interested in getting the data or the book finished and out of the Area of Operation than having concern for our SAFETY I guess. I felt rushed in the current situation. Over all, it did turn out to be a successful operation and we got credit for the book. Some officers got more credit than others in their career and it seemed they got more credit than we did. But I guess that’s politics in the military.
I guess it was a few months that I had been back from Iraq and I was waiting for the Master Sergeant Board results to come out. My Sergeant Major called me into his office and sat me down to tell me that he didn’t think I was ever going to make it to MSG because this rating period I was going to get a 2 block on my Evaluation Report from him. I looked at him in shock because I had just redeployed from Iraq and he didn’t even send a note or visit the five of us while we were there. As a special team, I thought for sure this was my punch ticket. I guess there are always career killers in your career. I couldn’t say anything but decided to take leave for a while. While I was on leave, I came down on assignment for my 5th combat tour to deployment to Afghanistan. Knowing what my SGM told me, I had a long talk with my wife. I told her that I knew we were having problems and the PTSD was getting worse. I found that there were programs to help soldiers with PTSD, so I went to the doctors and they evaluated me. I was told to go see a doctor at Walter Reed Army medical Center. In late 2006, I was diagnosed with severe PTSD and they recommended treatment at WTU. I reported back to my unit with orders assigned to WTU in Wash DC. My CSM was so mad that he told me I would never make it anywhere in my career again and he would see to it. I knew my career was over because once I gave the ok for treatment all my rights as a soldier were gone. I was like a genie pig and I was under control of the WTU. I had to move into the barracks and stay there for 1 year for treatment or until I was ready to come home to my family.
At first, it was as if there was nothing wrong with you as all your body parts are intact. You’re walking around seeing soldiers who come off the battlefield all blown up with missing limbs or blind or just not quite normal. But me, I have PTSD which is hidden and people just look at me like I’m SFC/E7 with some problems. It is a lot different when you get to the Psychiatric Department and you meet the group you’re going to be with for the next year. No one has rank or a last name. They just have a first name and everyone is in their own little shell, kind of like shell shock at first. No one talks to anyone unless you’re infantry. The infantry guys have some special bond and they just click with each other. They like to talk about killing shit and people in Iraq. At first, we did a lot of sitting and waiting for the doctors to call us, talk to us, and ask us how our day was. There were times when we thought about killing ourselves or felt suicidal. It was the same stuff every day. But, then we started therapy as a group, and this is how we bonded. Some days, people in our group talked about things that were on their minds or something they saw while they were there. Sometimes, it took them a whole year to come out of their shell. I won’t disclose a lot of information because most of this I want to keep private out of respect for the group I served with in the WTU. I guess you could say they took me back in combat with their stories and pictures they drew and shared with us. I wish I could say I kept in touch with them, but I haven’t. We all went our separate ways because we wanted it that way. Someday, I hope some or one of them will pick up my book and read it because you or the group will always be on my mind. If it was just cutting out pictures from magazines or listening to music to describe how you felt about yourself or light therapy or just talking to one another in the waiting room.
While I was there I learned that PTSD was not just a battlefield disease. PTSD comes in different forms as I learned from the many stories in my group. That’s one reason why I am trying to send the message out to everyone to let them know PTSD is a real thing and a slow killer. It is a hidden killer. It’s sad that a lot of us have it and will not speak up about it. We are too proud of ourselves, think we are better than others, the VA is too far or we just don’t want the support. Kids, soldiers, NOCs, officers, family members, grandparents and combat veterans all could have this. We never know who could have this hidden killer living inside us.
I don’t know where I would be today without treatment. I do know that when I was at the WTU it was difficult to talk to people because when the injury is not noticeable people don’t look at you like a fallen warrior. I noticed the guys and gals in wheel chairs got a lot of special treatment and I saw this doing job fairs and special events. We were outsiders and because we have PTSD, we are left out of the crowd. I experienced this while I was in the WTU when I went to the gym. People looked at me like, “Why are in this gym and what’s wrong with you?” When you talk to someone, they have a better understanding where you’re coming from and what your purpose is in life. If we don’t tell our story the people are not going to understand our treatment and the VA is not going to help us. I have to admit that the best assignment I ever had was where people take care of people at the WTU. The soldiers, NCOs, and officers who volunteered for the assignments or worked at the WTU, put their heart and soul into helping our wounded warriors put their lives back together and get on track. For some it was just a stepping stone, but others I could tell they did every day in their lives and they were there for a purpose. I didn’t always agree with all the programs they had, but I have to agree with the command and control they had because it helped me to do so much more after therapy. The nice thing about WTU was all the big job companies were right there. I mean major companies like the Department of Defense and etc. were they to support the wounded warrior if needed. A lot of these soldiers got their break here after the service. At night I could not go home to my family I work on my resume. My resume skills were not the best so I looked at other resumes on line or buddies resumes I served with and they helped me because they knew my career was over.
The situation I found myself in made me fight for my security clearance. I didn’t do anything wrong and saw no reason to lose my security clearance because I served my country well. I just had PTSD! I fought and won because that’s the only thing I had left to help get where I am today in life. I tell I did not sit on my butt; I started to get to the job fairs, and met a few people. I started NETWORKING and found that NETWORKING was the key to my success in life. I met a few gentlemen from a Department of Defense Agency and they asked me to do an internship with them while I was assigned to active duty and the WTU. Let me tell you, these guys took me under their arms and trained me to know what I know today and I will never forget the mentors in my life. I wish them the very best in their successful careers. PTSD can be a doormat in your life. For me, I’ve worked in an office environment and have been going to counseling every month. I have been talking to people about my problems to help cope with my demons. I don’t have bullets flying at me or people removing me from my combat positions. I don’t think my PTSD got any better when I got home to my family because I just could not get along with my wife. PTSD has taken me away from my family and I live alone dealing with my demons myself at night.
It’s good that I have a nice place to come home to at night to relax. I don’t have to worry about extra work, college work, or all kinds of bills and paperwork piling up. I sometimes write to express my feelings, but most of time I’m watching TV or I am on social media seeing what’s new. It’s great that I can wake up, go over and have breakfast with my father ever day in the morning, and relax. I drive to work, do my job, and protect the people that have to protect in case something happens in the real world. People believe in me and know that I will take care of the situation before it becomes a problem. While they are working, they never have to worry because I have it under control. The world has many different problems but PTSD is just one of them. I’m happy I have the friends that I can sit down with and talk to them about my problems. If you have a problem, I hope what you read beyond these pages will help you cope with your demons. As I stood on that parade field for the last time on Halloween, I wondered, what is my next step and where is this all going to take me? At least, I can look back and say it’s been one HELL of ride! I won’t miss any of it and I never go back again because my life was spared for some reason.
On 31 October 2008, 20 years and 21 days ago, I said my farewell to my family, my career and my love. It was the life I longed for and would never look back on because I was a broken warrior that could not serve my country anymore. After numerous combat missions and peace keeping deployments to the Middle East, my final tour was to start a new chapter in life as a retired veteran and soon to become civilian. I stood on the parade field at Fort Meade, Maryland as the Old Guard retired a few of us. My little girl watched the ceremony in which she can remember today as her father and her superhero say goodbye to the United States ARMY.
I look back today and try to remember my steps from being 19 years old when I left for Desert Shield/Desert Storm, to my final days in Iraq helping the ARMY write for the Center of ARMY Lessons Learned (CALL), and to my last ribbon placed on my uniform for my retirement ceremony. I will never know what my future could have been if I had accepted that 5th combat tour. Where would I be today? Would I be that Command Sergeant Major I always dreamed of being with my peers today? Or would I have died because of getting into a situation I could not have handled due to the PTSD getting so bad.
I believe that I took the right road because I’m here today writing my story and I have a little girl I can share my experiences with so she can pass it down through her generations. Even though there are some who want to forget the nightmares, every day I experience reminders of being in a combat situation or flashbacks of those days. The best thing to do is talk to someone or to write about it.
That brings me to the Warrior Transition Unit at Walter Reed ARMY Medical Center in Wash, DC. Something was just not right when I returned back from Iraq on my last deployment. I wasn’t really there for combat and I didn’t feel safe either because we didn’t have much protection while we were there. The leadership was more interested in getting the data or the book finished and out of the Area of Operation than having concern for our SAFETY I guess. I felt rushed in the current situation. Over all, it did turn out to be a successful operation and we got credit for the book. Some officers got more credit than others in their career and it seemed they got more credit than we did. But I guess that’s politics in the military.
I guess it was a few months that I had been back from Iraq and I was waiting for the Master Sergeant Board results to come out. My Sergeant Major called me into his office and sat me down to tell me that he didn’t think I was ever going to make it to MSG because this rating period I was going to get a 2 block on my Evaluation Report from him. I looked at him in shock because I had just redeployed from Iraq and he didn’t even send a note or visit the five of us while we were there. As a special team, I thought for sure this was my punch ticket. I guess there are always career killers in your career. I couldn’t say anything but decided to take leave for a while. While I was on leave, I came down on assignment for my 5th combat tour to deployment to Afghanistan. Knowing what my SGM told me, I had a long talk with my wife. I told her that I knew we were having problems and the PTSD was getting worse. I found that there were programs to help soldiers with PTSD, so I went to the doctors and they evaluated me. I was told to go see a doctor at Walter Reed Army medical Center. In late 2006, I was diagnosed with severe PTSD and they recommended treatment at WTU. I reported back to my unit with orders assigned to WTU in Wash DC. My CSM was so mad that he told me I would never make it anywhere in my career again and he would see to it. I knew my career was over because once I gave the ok for treatment all my rights as a soldier were gone. I was like a genie pig and I was under control of the WTU. I had to move into the barracks and stay there for 1 year for treatment or until I was ready to come home to my family.
At first, it was as if there was nothing wrong with you as all your body parts are intact. You’re walking around seeing soldiers who come off the battlefield all blown up with missing limbs or blind or just not quite normal. But me, I have PTSD which is hidden and people just look at me like I’m SFC/E7 with some problems. It is a lot different when you get to the Psychiatric Department and you meet the group you’re going to be with for the next year. No one has rank or a last name. They just have a first name and everyone is in their own little shell, kind of like shell shock at first. No one talks to anyone unless you’re infantry. The infantry guys have some special bond and they just click with each other. They like to talk about killing shit and people in Iraq. At first, we did a lot of sitting and waiting for the doctors to call us, talk to us, and ask us how our day was. There were times when we thought about killing ourselves or felt suicidal. It was the same stuff every day. But, then we started therapy as a group, and this is how we bonded. Some days, people in our group talked about things that were on their minds or something they saw while they were there. Sometimes, it took them a whole year to come out of their shell. I won’t disclose a lot of information because most of this I want to keep private out of respect for the group I served with in the WTU. I guess you could say they took me back in combat with their stories and pictures they drew and shared with us. I wish I could say I kept in touch with them, but I haven’t. We all went our separate ways because we wanted it that way. Someday, I hope some or one of them will pick up my book and read it because you or the group will always be on my mind. If it was just cutting out pictures from magazines or listening to music to describe how you felt about yourself or light therapy or just talking to one another in the waiting room.
While I was there I learned that PTSD was not just a battlefield disease. PTSD comes in different forms as I learned from the many stories in my group. That’s one reason why I am trying to send the message out to everyone to let them know PTSD is a real thing and a slow killer. It is a hidden killer. It’s sad that a lot of us have it and will not speak up about it. We are too proud of ourselves, think we are better than others, the VA is too far or we just don’t want the support. Kids, soldiers, NOCs, officers, family members, grandparents and combat veterans all could have this. We never know who could have this hidden killer living inside us.
I don’t know where I would be today without treatment. I do know that when I was at the WTU it was difficult to talk to people because when the injury is not noticeable people don’t look at you like a fallen warrior. I noticed the guys and gals in wheel chairs got a lot of special treatment and I saw this doing job fairs and special events. We were outsiders and because we have PTSD, we are left out of the crowd. I experienced this while I was in the WTU when I went to the gym. People looked at me like, “Why are in this gym and what’s wrong with you?” When you talk to someone, they have a better understanding where you’re coming from and what your purpose is in life. If we don’t tell our story the people are not going to understand our treatment and the VA is not going to help us. I have to admit that the best assignment I ever had was where people take care of people at the WTU. The soldiers, NCOs, and officers who volunteered for the assignments or worked at the WTU, put their heart and soul into helping our wounded warriors put their lives back together and get on track. For some it was just a stepping stone, but others I could tell they did every day in their lives and they were there for a purpose. I didn’t always agree with all the programs they had, but I have to agree with the command and control they had because it helped me to do so much more after therapy. The nice thing about WTU was all the big job companies were right there. I mean major companies like the Department of Defense and etc. were they to support the wounded warrior if needed. A lot of these soldiers got their break here after the service. At night I could not go home to my family I work on my resume. My resume skills were not the best so I looked at other resumes on line or buddies resumes I served with and they helped me because they knew my career was over.
The situation I found myself in made me fight for my security clearance. I didn’t do anything wrong and saw no reason to lose my security clearance because I served my country well. I just had PTSD! I fought and won because that’s the only thing I had left to help get where I am today in life. I tell I did not sit on my butt; I started to get to the job fairs, and met a few people. I started NETWORKING and found that NETWORKING was the key to my success in life. I met a few gentlemen from a Department of Defense Agency and they asked me to do an internship with them while I was assigned to active duty and the WTU. Let me tell you, these guys took me under their arms and trained me to know what I know today and I will never forget the mentors in my life. I wish them the very best in their successful careers. PTSD can be a doormat in your life. For me, I’ve worked in an office environment and have been going to counseling every month. I have been talking to people about my problems to help cope with my demons. I don’t have bullets flying at me or people removing me from my combat positions. I don’t think my PTSD got any better when I got home to my family because I just could not get along with my wife. PTSD has taken me away from my family and I live alone dealing with my demons myself at night.
It’s good that I have a nice place to come home to at night to relax. I don’t have to worry about extra work, college work, or all kinds of bills and paperwork piling up. I sometimes write to express my feelings, but most of time I’m watching TV or I am on social media seeing what’s new. It’s great that I can wake up, go over and have breakfast with my father ever day in the morning, and relax. I drive to work, do my job, and protect the people that have to protect in case something happens in the real world. People believe in me and know that I will take care of the situation before it becomes a problem. While they are working, they never have to worry because I have it under control. The world has many different problems but PTSD is just one of them. I’m happy I have the friends that I can sit down with and talk to them about my problems. If you have a problem, I hope what you read beyond these pages will help you cope with your demons. As I stood on that parade field for the last time on Halloween, I wondered, what is my next step and where is this all going to take me? At least, I can look back and say it’s been one HELL of ride! I won’t miss any of it and I never go back again because my life was spared for some reason.
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I went the other way - not depressed, but I took to looking at things in a lighter mood. My reaction was the move of my personality from a quiet, somewhat serious person to a 'kidder'. Instead of watching peopel have fun and just going along, I began to become to one who reached out by joking with those that were upset or down in the dumps.
You know:
"It's raining again guys. Anyone got soap?"
"LT, If you keep that tank going back and forth we won't need to have the engineers dig a fighting position."
"Well Captain, they didn't send any rations but the contractors bought 200 Porta-Potties. That must mean the rest of the Brigade is coming" .
It took years for me to realize I was suppressing the bad and looking for the good. It's still PTSD but it allowed me to continue to function.
You know:
"It's raining again guys. Anyone got soap?"
"LT, If you keep that tank going back and forth we won't need to have the engineers dig a fighting position."
"Well Captain, they didn't send any rations but the contractors bought 200 Porta-Potties. That must mean the rest of the Brigade is coming" .
It took years for me to realize I was suppressing the bad and looking for the good. It's still PTSD but it allowed me to continue to function.
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Good article. I've studied PTSD extensively. While I realize it carries a stigma, I'm loathe to play the politically correct game of re-naming things that don't fit in with one's world view. It really doesn't matter if you call it PTSI, PTSD, or just PTS. Injury? Ok. Disorder makes more sense to me as a social scientist. Whatever it is called, people will fear those that have it because it is a mental illness (disorder), however slight in some cases. This is why, (and I'm not being glib here), it is said that War is Hell. Literally. We may be better off distinguishing the average case of PTSD vs. the extreme cases. (scale of 1-10 as you said). Most cases are not debilitating.
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PO2 Gerry Tandberg
Sean,
Like yourself, I began the process of trying to understand PTS many years ago when my wife was diagnosed as having PTS due to several life changing incidents. She is a very strong individual, yet her symptoms mirrored those of combat vets. None of her symptoms surfaced for nearly twenty years, until after the death of our child, which threw her into a tail-spin. That is when all the sexual abuse, rape, and an automobile accident manifested itself in the form of nightmares, loss of sleep, inability to view certain movie/TV scenes depicting rape and child abuse. She didn't understand what was happening to her, and neither did I. Nearly everyone familiar with PTS agrees that all these symptoms, and they are legion, are a natural emotional responses. Therefore, it is considered a injury. Yes, one can learn to live with what they experienced, and the healing begins when it is understood that there is nothing wrong with them on an emotional level. In fact, it is expected. However, those exceptions are take form in various degrees. For those of us who are fortunate enough to have escaped witnessing, participating, or falling victims to a horrifying incident(s), we often find it difficult to believe how a life-changing emotional injury can effect us and others.
Like yourself, I began the process of trying to understand PTS many years ago when my wife was diagnosed as having PTS due to several life changing incidents. She is a very strong individual, yet her symptoms mirrored those of combat vets. None of her symptoms surfaced for nearly twenty years, until after the death of our child, which threw her into a tail-spin. That is when all the sexual abuse, rape, and an automobile accident manifested itself in the form of nightmares, loss of sleep, inability to view certain movie/TV scenes depicting rape and child abuse. She didn't understand what was happening to her, and neither did I. Nearly everyone familiar with PTS agrees that all these symptoms, and they are legion, are a natural emotional responses. Therefore, it is considered a injury. Yes, one can learn to live with what they experienced, and the healing begins when it is understood that there is nothing wrong with them on an emotional level. In fact, it is expected. However, those exceptions are take form in various degrees. For those of us who are fortunate enough to have escaped witnessing, participating, or falling victims to a horrifying incident(s), we often find it difficult to believe how a life-changing emotional injury can effect us and others.
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CW3 (Join to see)
Having lived through my share of horrifying events, I often wonder why more people are not injured in this way. The military needs to invest more money into research to find ways to treat/deal with these veterans. If they looked at it wisely, it would save money in the long run by avoiding having thousands of troops on disability.
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I am a Vietnam Combat Veteran; USMC. In Vietnam 3 separate times from 1967 till 1971. VA said I had no problems. Even though I can't sleep more than an hour or so at a time. Blood diseases Agent Orange a given. Numerous lesions on legs and arms. Only 60 % disabled. A neighbor kid came back from Iraq, no visible wounds, but saw someone of his buddies killed is getting 100% and can hold down a truck driving job. Don't make sense.
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CW3 (Join to see)
I don't understand how a disability pension isn't reduced by full time employment. Isn't the whole point of a disability pension to offset the ability to earn? It may be we've made it too easy to get such a pension. The pendulum is always swinging far left or far right.
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I left service in 2013 and just had my first comprehensive PTSD screen a couple of weeks ago. Now I can face some of the issues that pop up.
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This coming week, I'm going to introduce an expansion of NH's medical cannabis bill to add PTSD as a medically qualifying disease.
Truly, I want some feedback from fellow veterans on why you would support that or oppose that. Be specific please.
Truly, I want some feedback from fellow veterans on why you would support that or oppose that. Be specific please.
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LTC Jesse Edwards
CW3 (Join to see) - This article may be helpful.
http://reason.com/blog/2013/03/22/treating-ptsd-with-medical-marijuana
http://reason.com/blog/2013/03/22/treating-ptsd-with-medical-marijuana
Treating PTSD with Medical Marijuana Could Curb Veteran Suicides
When T.J. Thompson returned from serving in Iraq, the Veterans Administration put him on Lorazepam, a high-potency, short-acting drug used to fight anxiety,
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CW3 (Join to see)
Good article. But the bias from the pro-marijuana folks is a little much. It's still a drug. Some with PTSD are helped with drugs but the long term view is to get away from that. THC is still a drug. Keeping our vets doped up should not be our goal (except for the most severe cases).
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LTC Jesse Edwards
I wonder if your CID background colors your view on this. The US is among the most medicated populations on earth. We are awash in "drugs" to include alcohol. Medical Cannabis is not recreational pot. On the state level, medical cannabis is being chosen because it is among the safest of drugs with the fewest side effects. The opioid epidemic is extremely destructive and costly. Social isolation and self-medication is extremely destructive to individual veterans. Opening up the medical cannabis option is potentially a way to split those two extremes. We'll see. Texas and Utah started studies awhile ago and initial results seem promising.
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Alan K.
SPC Michelle Nelson - Thompson - Unfortunately it is a question on the 4473 every time you purchase a firearm.......
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