How do you deal with managing your own anger?

I refuse to loose my temper in front of anyone. I saw my mother do that often enough and all it does is make you look like a jack ass. I'll go behind a closed door and punch a pillow or something or vent to a friend who doesn't mind me cussing and fussing. I don't think I have ever lost my temper in front of my soldiers.

SGT (Join to see) Lesson learned. It’s time to check your mental well being. We must take care of ourselves if we planning on being of use to others.

1) You are human. Means you make mistakes and can learn from them. The fact you are asking a question means you can and will learn from this...
2) I was very similar. I would blow my top as a young Junior Officer, until a wise senior enlisted took me aside and explained how my attitude affects the sailors. Since I cared about my sailors, I realized I had to do something so they weren't scared to come into work.
3) I learned 2 coping mechanisms. Before heading into a stressful situation, or something that would trigger your anger, do a couple of deep breaths. When you are breathing deep make sure you are filling the bottom of your lungs (let your belly expand). The second was when you feel your anger rearing its ugly little head, just take everything slow. When you slow things down and consciously think about everything, you will un-cock the trigger.

Too easy a fix. Step one, apologize to your Soldiers and/or peers for losing your shit. Step two, go seek Behavioral Health for assistance in Anger Management. I also will play violent video games. Oddly, that helps me better vent my anger. Pumping weights works for some.

It does happen. We are not perfect. But, we can always do better and it takes a real man to admit he made a mistake.
I have not always done so, but I say my prayers to G-d the Father in Christ's name and I am able to stay calm almost 100% of the time.
Mark

#1 get counseling, #2 find a hobby that you can immerse yourself in, #3 When the pressure starts building take a walk (or run)...

Never lose your cool in front of your subordinates. I’d bite my tongue, walk out of the room or area, and vent alone or with other sr NVOs, never in front of them. They all knew, me yelling or swearing at them was nothing. In my office, when I got quiet, that’s when they knew the shit was going to fly. Always behind closed doors or away from all others

Own up to it. If it’s that bad explain to your subordinates that the anger was not directed at them. And if with peers, I’m pretty sure, they’d understand. People get angry at times in the military.!hence the term, “suck it up buttercup!”

I quit smoking, except on drill weekends, AT or deployment. If you see me smoking, it's a good bet that I'm angry.

Less and less with age, but I'm guilty. Toxic leadership is not good. It causes a loss of confidence and cooperation. Bearing is very important, and harsh words are reserved for worst cases. Praise in public, counsel in private. Remove any barriers or distractions in personal life, and remember that someone is always watching you. Set the example you would follow. Anger management can be tricky. Consider consulting with a role model or mentor.