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Lt Col Scott Shuttleworth
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I have seen it. The problem with men is that they are raised to be men and to never hit a woman. They are also raised that you suck it up and move on. Most men don't feel like a man when they have to say they are being abused. When they do report it, it is like you said, the cops don't believe it and the female plays the role of victim and the male goes to jail only to return home to more abuse. I wish more men would see it for what it is...abuse period. When they are abused, walk out the door and go straight to the hospital and get it documented and and report it. That way the female isn't around and you can tell your story. Abuse is abuse...period. Unfortunately, it happens more than we know and is a growing epidemic.
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PO3 Business Advisement
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7 y
Yup.
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SFC Caretaker
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7 y
My mom raised us to be respectful, and she raised my brother to respect a woman until she thought she was big enough to take on a man! I was raised the same way, I wasn't allowed to hit girls growing up unless I was cornered. But she made it perfectly clear that if I ever hit a man that I needed to be prepaired to get hit back. The system enables people's.
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PO3 Business Advisement
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Edited 7 y ago
I'm 6' and 244lbs.
My brother makes me look thin. He is a decade older than me and when we were younger, picked up the back of a car once to have me change the tire.
Then in the 90's he was talking to me and told me how his wife hit him several times with a cast iron pan. He was getting very emotional and was trying to gather himself together. His words might of been saying one thing, but the tears in his eyes and face screamed something completely different. I asked if he called the sheriff? He said (ya, they came out looked around, saw the impact marks on his shoulders and back of his head. Then told him that they don't believe him, as in how could a woman 1/3 rd your size attack you like that?) Then they started handing out information about spousal abuse to his wife.
I asked what the doctors at the hospital said? He said there were no broken bones and that he is not paying for a doctor to put some damn butterfly's and tape on when he can do that himself.
I asked what the hell started this all? He started speaking about the 7 horses and how he is working so much driving truck, that not everything is getting done.
A year or so later they divorced.
My brother was a great guy, he was my best friend growing up. But after that the years ate at him. After how he saw the system work he now trusts nothing and I truly mean nothing.
No longer the person I grew up with, completely different.
What I learned was that as a man your size is your enemy. Because your a big strong guy the public automatically places you in the aggressive, abusive, non-listening and can take it all category.
You can be the kindest, softest, gentlest, nonviolent man in the world. But because your tall and muscular you can not be any of those positive qualities by public default.
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SFC Caretaker
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7 y
I'm so sorry for your brother. Hopefully he can find peace.
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CPL Crystal Pettway, MBA
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Wish more men would speak up/out. This is not a one-sided thing. Women can be abusive as well.
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SMSgt Lawrence McCarter
SMSgt Lawrence McCarter
7 y
CPL Pettway, You are correct, no one has a monopoly on abusive behavior as a retired Police Officer I've seen many cases that bear out what You say.
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