Posted on Oct 12, 2015
Have Participation Trophies hurt or helped our societal culture?
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2016 Kia Sorento Built For Football Families “Participation”
After a football awards ceremony, a proud father is surprised to see his son received a participation trophy. He decides to take matters into his own hands b...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v-gwjJ_NXKU
The science suggests that we need to be praise our kids on process, not results. For example, instead of dealing with defeat by telling our kids that “everyone’s a winner at heart,” we should praise them for how hard they hustled, what they did right and how they improved.
But it’s not just the “losers” we need to worry about; it’s the “winners” too. Phrases like “You’re a winner” or “You’re a natural” can actually be toxic to how kids deal with losing. As the work of child psychologist Carol Dweck shows us (link is external), praising kids for their innate talents (in this study’s case, their intelligence) actually makes it more difficult for them to cope when they’re actually confronted with losing. Kids who are praised for their effort rather than their ability tend to strive harder, enjoy activities more, and deal with failure in a more resilient way.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-new-you/201409/should-we-give-our-kids-participation-trophies
The science suggests that we need to be praise our kids on process, not results. For example, instead of dealing with defeat by telling our kids that “everyone’s a winner at heart,” we should praise them for how hard they hustled, what they did right and how they improved.
But it’s not just the “losers” we need to worry about; it’s the “winners” too. Phrases like “You’re a winner” or “You’re a natural” can actually be toxic to how kids deal with losing. As the work of child psychologist Carol Dweck shows us (link is external), praising kids for their innate talents (in this study’s case, their intelligence) actually makes it more difficult for them to cope when they’re actually confronted with losing. Kids who are praised for their effort rather than their ability tend to strive harder, enjoy activities more, and deal with failure in a more resilient way.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-new-you/201409/should-we-give-our-kids-participation-trophies
Society
Recognition
Achievement
Posted >1 y ago
Responses: 41
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I believe the everyone gets a trophy is BS. Let me pontificate. I think you have to put in the time, effort, sweat, determination, grit and all the other things to be successful. When we give trophy's for a kid putting on a football jersey or a baseball jersey or a soccer uniform and sit on the couch till game time and half heartedly don't attend practices because mommy says they weren't in the mood that day, show up and give no effort and don't understand the plays and hurt the team and whine because they didn't get to play then get a well done trophy for showing up...that reinforce sloppy and lazy behavior...when you get to a job...show up or don't show up and do your job half assed and see what it gets you. Don't show up for class in college or don't do the required assignments see what happens. In the military we train folks hard and only the best and best qualified get the jobs they want...you can't show up to pilot training , fly when you want to, the sorties you want to, and locations you want to and still get your wings...there is no participation trophy for not excelling! Try Ranger school, BUDS, PJ and TACP schools...same same.
When I was growing up I tried out for the baseball team...thought I was ready...I wasn't...I got cut...you know what it taught me a valuable lesson...not everyone can do what they want. You know what I did, I practiced for the entire next year, throwing, catching, batting, fielding and I tried out the next year and made it but barely...but I made it because I didn't get damn participation trophy...I worked for it. Same for my daughter, we taught her the same way...she tried out for cheer her 8th grade year...didn't make it, guess what, she bought a trampoline, practiced her stunts and jumps over the year and the next year made the High School squad as a Freshman.
It is a good practice to tell kids you are improving, great hustle, and if you work a little bit harder as an individual and as a team we can win...but to give everyone trophy for breathing is BS in my book. In life there are winners and losers in every activity...just stop and think about your daily walk at home, the office, or at leisure...compromise all day long to get what you need to be successful...Sometimes you win sometimes you lose but somebody is always on one side or the other.
Maj Marty Hogan Lt Col Charlie Brown 1stSgt Glenn Brackin
Cpl Craig Morton SGT David A. 'Cowboy' Groth COL Mikel J. Burroughs
LTC Stephen C. CPL Dave Hoover PO3 Bob McCord
Lt Col John (Jack) Christensen Sgt Wayne Wood PVT James Strait
SFC Jack Champion MSgt David Hoffman MSgt Stephen Council
PO1 H Gene Lawrence 1SG Steven Imerman SGT Steve McFarland Cynthia C.
When I was growing up I tried out for the baseball team...thought I was ready...I wasn't...I got cut...you know what it taught me a valuable lesson...not everyone can do what they want. You know what I did, I practiced for the entire next year, throwing, catching, batting, fielding and I tried out the next year and made it but barely...but I made it because I didn't get damn participation trophy...I worked for it. Same for my daughter, we taught her the same way...she tried out for cheer her 8th grade year...didn't make it, guess what, she bought a trampoline, practiced her stunts and jumps over the year and the next year made the High School squad as a Freshman.
It is a good practice to tell kids you are improving, great hustle, and if you work a little bit harder as an individual and as a team we can win...but to give everyone trophy for breathing is BS in my book. In life there are winners and losers in every activity...just stop and think about your daily walk at home, the office, or at leisure...compromise all day long to get what you need to be successful...Sometimes you win sometimes you lose but somebody is always on one side or the other.
Maj Marty Hogan Lt Col Charlie Brown 1stSgt Glenn Brackin
Cpl Craig Morton SGT David A. 'Cowboy' Groth COL Mikel J. Burroughs
LTC Stephen C. CPL Dave Hoover PO3 Bob McCord
Lt Col John (Jack) Christensen Sgt Wayne Wood PVT James Strait
SFC Jack Champion MSgt David Hoffman MSgt Stephen Council
PO1 H Gene Lawrence 1SG Steven Imerman SGT Steve McFarland Cynthia C.
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I do not believe that participation trophies are productive. It shows the youth that you can get the same credit just for being there as the kid who has natural ability and works his tail off. If you were at a place of employment and the boss said you weren't going to get a raise because they couldn't give the slacker next to you one also and it wouldn't be fair, how would you react? You deserve more if you work harder it's what pushes people to be better.
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SFC (Join to see)
Exactly! Important thing to teach our children is how to lose gracefully and win gracefully; both are needed.
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Cpl Henry Busby
I totally agree. I always told my boys that if they were not going to put in maximum effort, what was the point of being on the team. My last experience was with my granddaughter who had to come stay with me while her father was deployed and the mother was totally dysfunctional. She ended up staying with me from the age of 3 to 15. I had her join the local track team, and honestly she didn't want to do it, but I convinced her to just try it out. At first she didn't put her heart into training and was just showing up. In races she would always be trailing the field. I told her that she could quit the team if she chose to, but I asked her for one thing. I asked her to give it her all for just a month. I also asked her how she felt always looking at the backs of the other girls? In one race I encouraged her to run her best in this race and if she still wanted to quit, she could, and I bribed her that if I saw her giving her best, I would do something special for her. I knew that she had the wheels but not the drive, but in this race, she went all out and came in 3rd against a field of 8. I asked her how that felt, because the two girls who came in 1st and 2nd was the fastest girls on the team. The coach and I knew that she had it in her, but she didn't. By the end of the season she was never out of the top 3 and finished 1st in multiple races. She actually went to state and won. Then to the Junior Olympics where she placed 2nd nationally. Then made it to college on a track scholarship. She did not pursue running as a career, but now at 23 with two kids of her own, she and I talk about her running career with pride and satisfaction in what she accomplished. That feeling is far greater than a participation medal. And now she has all her medals to show her boys. I think that a parent does their child a disservice to allow them to settle for a participation medal. If their heart is not in the sport, then why be on a team whose objective is to win? Of course they might not always win, but there is satisfaction in trying your hardest, Just my humble opinion.
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Short answer, Hurt. Need proof, consider the Me Generation who are products of the participation trophy culture.
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SFC (Join to see)
Lt Col John (Jack) Christensen I just love folk telling us about life in the 60 and 70’s. :)
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SGT (Join to see)
SFC (Join to see) - So strange isn't it? Or those that tell others what they think, feel, and what they've been through. It's almost like they lived our lives... Oh wait.
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SFC Ralph E Kelley
Lt Col John (Jack) Christensen - The thing about it the 70 years were paid for by the participating people. Kinda like the running races charge a fee, but give you a T-shirt regards if you finish or not.
However you get to wear a 'feel-good' participation trophy for which you paid cash to wear during the race and afterwards.
Its only since people began to equate 'Perticipation' with winning that the trophies began to have an affect of childrens ability to coat with failure. When I was a youngster, my mother or father would say. "I bought you a T-Shirt - now get out their and run. If my Dad had bought me a Blue First Place Ribbon and said, "I paid for you win First Place", at 8 years old I would have felt denied any achievement. I might have (at 8 years) been able to express it as I have today BUT I would have been diappoint at my father's lack of faith (or REAL support) of my efforts.
However you get to wear a 'feel-good' participation trophy for which you paid cash to wear during the race and afterwards.
Its only since people began to equate 'Perticipation' with winning that the trophies began to have an affect of childrens ability to coat with failure. When I was a youngster, my mother or father would say. "I bought you a T-Shirt - now get out their and run. If my Dad had bought me a Blue First Place Ribbon and said, "I paid for you win First Place", at 8 years old I would have felt denied any achievement. I might have (at 8 years) been able to express it as I have today BUT I would have been diappoint at my father's lack of faith (or REAL support) of my efforts.
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MSgt (Join to see)
Which is return participation trophies because they give society a false sense of entitlement. Earn a trophy legitimately. Just being there doesn't mean you actually did anything to earn a trophy. Plays into that saying "do you want a cookie?"
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Definitely Hurt Culture! (IMHO)
Life isn’t fair and there are winners and losers. Everyone doesn’t come in first!
I definitely believe ‘participation’ trophies by themselves is a set up for disaster. This practice is psychologically damaging. It encourages ‘entitlement’ as opposed to strong work ethic and sportsman like conduct. Did everyone running for Democratic candidate for President receive a participation award?
(just my two cents)
Life isn’t fair and there are winners and losers. Everyone doesn’t come in first!
I definitely believe ‘participation’ trophies by themselves is a set up for disaster. This practice is psychologically damaging. It encourages ‘entitlement’ as opposed to strong work ethic and sportsman like conduct. Did everyone running for Democratic candidate for President receive a participation award?
(just my two cents)
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Find it a little ironic we are talking about participation trophies in a military forum, when we all know there are no participation awards for the losers in war and conflict.
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SGT (Join to see)
SPC Michael Terrell well, belated congratulations! You deserved it. Now, there is so much red tape, getting promoted is a job in itself. I’m not even sure if generals can promote someone on the spot anymore. It seems there is roadblock after roadblock.
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SGT (Join to see)
SPC Michael Terrell thanks for sharing your story. Very glad it ended well for you. You have a blessed day as well!
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SPC Michael Terrell
It took about a month for it to go through, back then. It was my day off, and I was trying to get some sleep, having worked 60 of the previous 72 hours. The company clerk was banging on my door. I opened it, to his smiling face. "Man you ain't going to believe this! You're being promoted!" I asked, "What are you talking about?" He told me the E8 had called our Captain while he was in the Captain's office, and used the speakerphone so he heard the E8 demand that I be busted in rank, then the other details.
The best part was the General came to Ft. Greely from Fairbanks, with his photographer to get photos of both pinning my SP4 pins on my uniform, and of him giving me the letter. That was over 200 miles, round trip. A true officer and gentleman. :)
The best part was the General came to Ft. Greely from Fairbanks, with his photographer to get photos of both pinning my SP4 pins on my uniform, and of him giving me the letter. That was over 200 miles, round trip. A true officer and gentleman. :)
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This is like jocks, claiming that they gave 110%. You would be dead at 100%.
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Cpl Henry Busby
And that is fine Sir, but for an athlete, their endeavors are just as important to them as yours are to you. Everyone is not an athlete and everyone does not enjoy sports, yet millions around the world do. To each his own I say.
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SPC Michael Terrell
Cpl Henry Busby - I worked as a Broadcast engineer, which often required lifting heavy equipment, and other tasks that were physically draining. Have you ever picked up a Pontiac 389 short block? I did, not long before I went into Basic. I was doing TV repair at that time. Zenith sold an eight foot wide combo with a slate top. They were marked, "Move with no less than seven people or a fork lift." I, and anther tech would routinely load them in and out of a service truck bu ourselves, so we didn't need to go to a gym.
If you enjoy sports, participate or watch. The only sport I like was IROC and NASCAR races, but IROC is gone, and NASCAR has become too boring to watch. I don't care about their garages, homes or seeing in car cameras o a wreck from a dozen different cameras.
I used to rent a PA system to a high school for their football games. I had to be there in case of any problems, but I would sit in my service truck and watch television.
If you enjoy sports, participate or watch. The only sport I like was IROC and NASCAR races, but IROC is gone, and NASCAR has become too boring to watch. I don't care about their garages, homes or seeing in car cameras o a wreck from a dozen different cameras.
I used to rent a PA system to a high school for their football games. I had to be there in case of any problems, but I would sit in my service truck and watch television.
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Cpl Henry Busby
Before entering the Corps I did a bit of boxing, but I was always a runner. I began studying martial arts while stationed on Okinawa, and that became my sport of choice. After coming back to the world, I volunteered to train local kids at the community center in South Central LA, and after that a friend and I opened a dojo we called The Street Fighting Academy. We entered a lot of local tournaments. My specialty was Weapons Kata and did a few full contact matches. We were blessed to know the founder of The Black Stuntmen's Association and was able to do some work back in the days of the "Black Exploitation movies". Even today, even though I don't train anymore, I enjoy going to the gym. And I don't run anymore but still like brisk walks daily. Yes, you can get in shape with work, but many enjoy that personal challenge against self.
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There is no second, third, or fourth place in war. You either win or you lose. The ultimate participation trophy is a military grave marker. . . .
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