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COL Mikel J. Burroughs
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Edited >1 y ago
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Thomas Weissmuller I went through a very similar situation since 2004 when I went through a divorce that affected my relationship with my daughters at a very young age, a deployment for over 19 months separated from any contact with my children, and many years of scars and wounds that needed to be repaired over time. I've paid for all of my daughter’s education and taken care of them from afar with guidance, purchasing cars, car insurance and the list goes on and its been a tough road. The Good news is today, because I never alienated them with their mother or even talked bad about her, we've got a fantastic relationship and they understand everything about the divorce the reasons, etc. Great link for military members and veterans going through similar situations. I'm going to share this link with other if you don't mind Thomas.

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PO1 Ron Clark
PO1 Ron Clark
>1 y
PO1 Ron Clark - Keep on pushing brother! LCpl when you are about to receive a break through for good, some folk will always try and make it hard for you! Just keep the faith, do what you are supposed to do and what you think is right and keep proper documentation of any monies you pay in support of your dependent, and Pray until something happens (P.U.S.H.), God got you! Semper Fi man!
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GySgt Melissa Gravila
GySgt Melissa Gravila
>1 y
My kids have said "the older we get, the smarter and cooler you guys get!" LOL After all, how many kids can say their parents are fans of five finger death punch?
S/F
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SP5 Jeannie Carle
SP5 Jeannie Carle
>1 y
My Grandfather told me I was going to be just amazed at how smart they got the older I got. I am Grateful to God that he lived long enough for me to tell him how right he was. He was SUCH a wise man.
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SP5 Jeannie Carle
SP5 Jeannie Carle
>1 y
MSgt Robert C Aldi - Grandpa died while I was stationed in So Korea - I don't think there's a thing on this earth could have hit me harder :'( And there's no power on earth could make me dishonor him in word, thought, or deed. I hope I never have.
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LTC Stephen F.
15
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Children do indeed do best when their are two parents raising them Thomas Weissmuller. My first wife divorced me in 1996 when my sons were 5, 7 and 10. She remarried and stayed in the area with me keeping them in the home until she divorced her husband and I remarried both in 1999. The two youngest sons stayed with me until they reached the age of 12 when they could stay where they wanted. We had established in the divorce agreement that if a child moved with one parent they would stay with them throughout the school year - my ex-wife moved from Virginia to Florida. It was challenging to raise the boys and reteach them each time they came back to live with us.
By the grace of God each of the sons survived and they have become resilient young men. My prayer was that my sons would feel comfortable talking with me. They each talk with me about things they can't talk with others and I keep their confidence.
Thanks for alerting me COL Mikel J. Burroughs
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LTC Stephen F.
LTC Stephen F.
>1 y
SSgt Robert Marx - my current wife certainly worked her best to be a mother to my three plus her son whom I adopted. My first wife married two men after me [plus 2 before me] - all of those marriages ended in divorce - she initiated 4 divorces. She insisted she had no income each year from 2000 until 2008 when the youngest moved back with us and I didn't have to pay child support.
Per the Lord's direction, I still pray for my first wife.
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SSgt Robert Marx
SSgt Robert Marx
>1 y
LTC Stephen F. - I married a woman who had 3 divorces. Her marriage with the man after me ended with her widowhood. Her children include, beside our daughter, 2 women who are totally dependent upon Mom and hook up with various losers, and her 1 son who has done quite well. My daughter has an issue with autism and she has a well documented history of self-harm. All of that scares me so I pray the more for her.
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SPC David Hack
SPC David Hack
>1 y
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SSgt Robert Marx - Sarge, this means prayers ascending!
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SP5 Jeannie Carle
SP5 Jeannie Carle
>1 y
My vet ex left me one day before our youngest son's first birthday - I lived with his constant threats to take them away from me for 16 years - lost my cool on our son's 16th birthday - told him in clear words to STFU - it got interesting for a while, yes it did, but he couldn't threaten me with that any more. We ended up, about a year before his death, in actually finally getting to be "friends". I told him, while he was in a coma, that he was being a total ass by dying NOW, WTH??? His then-wife and I both swear he tried to smile.
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CPT Jack Durish
12
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I fought for custody when my wife and I divorced over 40 years ago. I suppose I shouldn't have. There was little question I was going to lose that battle. My attorney advised me to forget it and even agree to allow her latest boyfriend to adopt them. Yes, I too was horrified at the suggestion but, as things turned out, I may as well have. Our daughter is dead and our son hasn't spoken to me in more than 30 years. Some may argue that times have changed, that fathers are now winning custody or there's joint custody. I wouldn't bet on it. If you are party to an amicable divorce, I suppose you have a chance of sharing custody amicably. But if you foolishly married a bride from hell (as I did), you may just have to acknowledge that there's a price to be paid for that foolishness. Oh come on now. You'll recognize her if you don't allow your judgement to be clouded by lust. When the signs are all there and your family and friends are warning you, you have no one to blame but yourself. I have and I've forgiven myself. Sadly, our children never did...
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Thomas Weissmuller
Thomas Weissmuller
>1 y
I am sorry for what you and your children have endured. Some believe they can save the one they plan to marry, despite the many warnings from family and friends. No blame should be placed in that event. Life lessons should never be so costly. Sadly, 86% of men lose custody today. State family courts stopped sharing statistics because they cannot overcome their tendency of protecting women, even when the veracity of testimony is called into question. There is a problem with the system that must be corrected. Federal courts have actually warned state family courts (in rare instances of crossing jurisdictional issues) but they refuse to intervene as custody is still a matter of state jurisdiction and no appeal may be taken to federal court. The system is a mess.
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SSgt Robert Marx
SSgt Robert Marx
>1 y
I am sorry for such a huge loss, sir. I had to endure a nasty divorce from back in 2004 and I had "joint custody." That is a joke, and when the mother wants to cut off contact there is not much to do but to file a grievance with the court. To go to court would be such a process that can not be resolved before the child is several years older and might even be an adult. My ex-wife has now got many diverse problems stemming from her decisions, I wish her no ill will, but I would prefer to never see or talk with her again.
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