Posted on Feb 3, 2021
How do you deal with someone trying to call you "Stolen Valor"?
357K
1.25K
350
122
122
0
So for all the vets here, how do y'all deal with someone trying to call you "Stolen Valor" in a polite way? Even if they are being aggressive about it? I've been out on a MEB for almost a year now and there's a store in my state with "Superhero Parking" for Vets, Active Duty, Law enforcement and firefighters, while I haven't parked there yet, I'm sure once I do someone will attempt to say something about it. I have my VA Card and my driver's license says Veteran on it and I have an entire album in my phone with pictures of my army times. Now what if this isn't enough to get them to back off? How can I politely tell them they're wrong and to drop the situation?
Posted 5 y ago
Responses: 236
I remember what Dr Suess said. Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind
(142)
(0)
SSgt James Carter
Lt Col Scott Arnott - I find the older I get, the less that pisses me off in this world. I must admit that I expected the opposite.
(4)
(0)
COL Larry Crockett
I use those parking spaces all the time. The only comments I have ever received were : "Thank you for your suffice".
(5)
(0)
MSG William Wold
I've still got a finger that works. Vietnam combat vet, 60% VA, US Army retirement card says Msgt. Like a dog piss, on em and walk off. Or if my wife is with me we use her disabled parking sticker, but then I have to be more, um, "friendly".
(2)
(0)
I don't think it will happen. Yes, there are the rare viral videos, but it's just not the social norm.
I'm sure I'm not the only one dreaming at the chance to lock up a crusty retired CSM calling me out for parking in the Home Depot veteran parking and then pull out my CAC and demand me he show me his.
But that's not how the world outside of my head works ;-)
In the day to day world your veteran license plate frame is enough credentials.
************
The most I was able to do in terms of call anyone out was at a local gun range. They give military a discount, and the guy was trying to BS his way to a discount with the clerk. He pulled out dog tags or something.
I interjected into the conversation between him and the clerk, and showing my CAC ID I said, "she want's to see this".
It was a little bit of awesome but not YouTube worthy.
I'm sure I'm not the only one dreaming at the chance to lock up a crusty retired CSM calling me out for parking in the Home Depot veteran parking and then pull out my CAC and demand me he show me his.
But that's not how the world outside of my head works ;-)
In the day to day world your veteran license plate frame is enough credentials.
************
The most I was able to do in terms of call anyone out was at a local gun range. They give military a discount, and the guy was trying to BS his way to a discount with the clerk. He pulled out dog tags or something.
I interjected into the conversation between him and the clerk, and showing my CAC ID I said, "she want's to see this".
It was a little bit of awesome but not YouTube worthy.
(80)
(0)
SGT Ron Salvato
1st Lt Padre Dave Poedel - CAC = Common Access Card. lol I had to look it up. I got out in Dec 96. I believe the CAC replaced our Military ID Card?
(1)
(0)
CPT (Join to see)
The CAC replaced the old military ID. It also allows you to log onto and access a whole host of government websites that will invariably be down for maintenance at the moment you need them.
(0)
(0)
CPL Shawn Lunsford
CPT (Join to see) - isn't that the truth I Rember when we couldn't go on leave till we had to start an AKO account now it doesn't exist anymore from what I'm told I'm retired myself and sometimes have to explant to ID 10 Tangos that a CAC is for active or GS positions and my blue Id card is for retired
(0)
(0)
That's on them. You don't "owe" anyone validation. Other than a couple videos on facespace and twatter, I've never seen it happen in person. Personally, I'd pull my phone out and start videoing them. They're always brave when behind the lens. Flip the script on them.
(77)
(0)
SP5 Dean Moore
SFC (Join to see) - Did you register yours at the court house in the county that you live in. I did there is always a copy that can be had at any time.
(0)
(0)
SFC (Join to see)
I did, but like you, when I first got out digital copies were t a thing. I scanned mine a few years back and put it in my files on my phone. Now, I have a copy with me at all times. For no other reason than it’s handy, SP5 Dean Moore
(0)
(0)
Buy some cheap poker chips and put a few completely random drawings on them with a Sharpie. When challenged, present them with the "coin" and tell them congratulations and thank you for defending those who defended us. Tell them "This coin can be redeemed at any veteran organization/drinking post for a complimentary fuzzy navel." Render a proper salute and carry on.
It will blow their minds.
It will blow their minds.
(27)
(0)
I wouldn't worry about a hypothetical argument or about a confrontation that hasn't happened. You have valid ID to support your claim. At the end of the day that is enough to be compliant within the letter of the law. You can't change human behavior. You might be confronted, you might not. They might believe you, they might not. You can't change how they will react or how they think. Don't twist yourself into a knot about it.
(17)
(0)
SMSgt Lawrence McCarter
I've never had it happen to Me besides I do have a retired Military ID, VA Card, Veteran is also on My driver license and have a vehicle that has Veteran plates upon it including a Vietnam Tab.
(2)
(0)
SSgt Christophe Murphy
SMSgt Lawrence McCarter - people on social media these days like to make a scene when trying to randomly out a "stolen valor" case
(2)
(0)
I refer to those parking spots as integrity parking. You are the only one who can truly judge if you can park there. If you fit the profile then park there. If you don't fit the profile then don't park there. The only one who can judge you is yourself. If challenged by someone politely tell them to call the police. Only handicap parking is legally enforceable. Walk away and keep an eye on your vehicle. Discretely take a picture of the person with your phone if you feel it is warranted. If you served, you do not owe anyone an explanation of service. Your integrity is your only judge.
(15)
(0)
Personally, I’ll never have that problem. When I wear all six of my ribbons, I call it REVERSE stolen valor. People say, “You should wear ALL of your ribbons and badges,” and I say, “This IS all of my ribbons and badges.”
But seriously, showing someone a VA Health Identification Card ought to settle it. (And if you don’t have one, you should get one. And if you’re not a disabled veteran (at least 10% disabled), you can get one anyway. And if you’re not at least enrolled with the VA...you really should be. Just to get your name in the system. Someday you’ll want benefits, home loan, GI Bill for college, something, and you’ll already be in.)
Or another score-settler may be your driver’s license. Some states will print something like the word “VETERAN” on your card if you show them a DD-214. Technically you could carry around a copy of your DD-214 with you, put seriously, who does that?
And then, not to blame the victim, but what was the veteran doing that made someone accuse them of stolen valor? Wearing the wrong uniform to the wrong locale? That’s how people get called out. Nobody will bat an eye if you wear your nice stuff to your sister’s wedding. They WILL ask questions if you wear half a jacked-up ACU to the community college.
But in general, if one vet calls out another, it ought to be easy to sort out. There are a lot of super-easy questions that can identify the imposter (“Where did you graduate from your MOS school? What Basic platoon were you?”) that can establish credibility. And if they still don’t believe you for some reason, and you’re going to see them later, tell them you’ll bring your DD-214. If you’re never going to see them again... forget about it. Like you said, just be polite about it and don’t get in a fist fight.
But seriously, showing someone a VA Health Identification Card ought to settle it. (And if you don’t have one, you should get one. And if you’re not a disabled veteran (at least 10% disabled), you can get one anyway. And if you’re not at least enrolled with the VA...you really should be. Just to get your name in the system. Someday you’ll want benefits, home loan, GI Bill for college, something, and you’ll already be in.)
Or another score-settler may be your driver’s license. Some states will print something like the word “VETERAN” on your card if you show them a DD-214. Technically you could carry around a copy of your DD-214 with you, put seriously, who does that?
And then, not to blame the victim, but what was the veteran doing that made someone accuse them of stolen valor? Wearing the wrong uniform to the wrong locale? That’s how people get called out. Nobody will bat an eye if you wear your nice stuff to your sister’s wedding. They WILL ask questions if you wear half a jacked-up ACU to the community college.
But in general, if one vet calls out another, it ought to be easy to sort out. There are a lot of super-easy questions that can identify the imposter (“Where did you graduate from your MOS school? What Basic platoon were you?”) that can establish credibility. And if they still don’t believe you for some reason, and you’re going to see them later, tell them you’ll bring your DD-214. If you’re never going to see them again... forget about it. Like you said, just be polite about it and don’t get in a fist fight.
(15)
(0)
SFC (Join to see)
I was six months from retiring when they decided I "HAD" to have a new DA photo. I wore my Army Service Ribbon, DUIs, and name tag.
(3)
(0)
SPC John Tacetta
Spoken truly: get that VA card, any vet with good paper can. It helps the center that issues it as well.
(1)
(0)
I have the "Veteran" identification on my Tennessee drivers license. They had to get a copy of my DD214 before putting it on there. Plus I have my V.A. ID. That is, if they pushed the issue. Very few go to that extent. Usually it is only the idiot attention seekers that bother. I choice would be to just ignore them and they will go away like a fart in the wind.
(12)
(0)
SSG Bill McCoy
At first, in PA you had to prove you were a Veteran to get the Flag with "Veteran" on your license. But, typical lazy workers now just ask most people, "Are you a Vet?" with no proof. As a result, places like Home Depot require a VA ID Card and even then, it has to say, "Service Connected," at least that's what I encountered. I got my first VA card the day I signed-up and before I got a rating. With that card, I could not get the 10% discount. On small purchases, it was no big deal, but when I had a major project, it was because 10% became a pretty hefty amount.
(4)
(0)
Cpl Vic Burk
The local Home Depot here wouldn't give me the discount so I go to Lowes. My discount is hooked up with my "My Lowes" card but they still ask for ID to verify who you are and that is OK with me. What was happening was people borrowing the "My Lowes" card from veterans to get the discount so now you have to prove it is you.
(3)
(0)
LtCol Bruce Janis
Cpl Vic Burk - Home a depot seems to have changed. You now have to fill out some paperwork on line and submit a scan of your DD-214 or retired ID.
(2)
(0)
Cpl Vic Burk
LtCol Bruce Janis - I went to Home Depot last week because Lowes didn't have the flooring my wife wanted and I inquired about the Military discount and they gave it to me. First time they ever did. I just showed my V.A. card.
(1)
(0)
Ignore the ignorant and go on with life, there are those that search out power over others like a drug, just smile and walk away for those that constantly seek battle with windmills (Don Quixote) time is not to be wasted on them.
(11)
(0)
Read This Next

Stolen Valor
Help
Heroes
Tank Crewman
Honorable Discharge
