Children
Children
Posted on Dec 9, 2025
How do you manage a heated discussion with your grown child without saying 'yes'when s/he says you treat me like a child. Do I look stupid?
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As parents, we have been there, done that. We are trying to detour our children from unnecessary problems or toxic relationships before they irreversibly ruin their lives.
Family
Military Family
Children
Single Parent
Posted 4 d ago
Responses: 6
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A1C Medrick "Rick" DeVaney PO3 Richard T. LTC (Join to see) Maj Kim Patterson PO3 Edward Riddle SP5 Dennis Loberger CPL Douglas Chrysler PO1 H Gene Lawrence Lt Col John (Jack) Christensen SGT (Join to see) LTC Stephen C. PO1 William "Chip" Nagel Sgt David G Duchesneau SSG Derrick Iozzio MAJ Dale E. Wilson, Ph.D. SGT Carl Blas
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PO3 Phyllis Maynard
PO3 Edward Riddle when I use a comment box with just names, it is to mention them, to connect them to the post so they are able to read the post. You can only mention 20 names, at one time.
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SP5 Dennis Loberger
PO3 Phyllis Maynard - I love how devoted Mothers are. They will endure anything for their children and seem to never give up hope. You are one of those
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PO3 Phyllis Maynard
SP5 Dennis Loberger it was a male friend, 15 years ago, when my son was in college he said to, "... you go out and keep dragging him out of the mud until he gets it right. .others don't ever give up". Whew! Today, he is an exceptional person.
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SP5 Dennis Loberger
It all begins with belief. You believed and that helped him believe too. Had you not, he might very well have stayed on the same road and given up. Good for you..............and him
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Without any specifics, it is difficult to offer any meaningful advice.
First, if it has gotten to the point of heat, disengage. Quite often when either side has become heated, someone will say something they don't really mean and will regret.
Second, in a verbal disagreement, people are usually formulating their next response instead of listening to the other person. Listen, really listen. Pausing to listen and then really think about your response before verbalizing it.
Third, the heat usually comes when someone is told they are "wrong." If those words come from you, your grown child starts digging in. Don't tell someone they are wrong. If you have concerns or see flaws, ask questions. "Have you thought about...? Do you have a plan to deal with the possibility of...? If your child tells you that you are wrong, ask them to explain what their concerns are. Then tell them you will think about those concerns
Third, go to YouTube. Search "Stoic philosophy" watch the videos. Learn the difference between responding and reacting.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWLm44zcTMg&list=PLn-a5qvj79quwRrIr5gv1ooY4-di8Y6JW&index=13
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dLwrgrtyMYc&list=PLn-a5qvj79quwRrIr5gv1ooY4-di8Y6JW&index=17
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SyKZRbhDcsg&list=PLn-a5qvj79quwRrIr5gv1ooY4-di8Y6JW&index=12
First, if it has gotten to the point of heat, disengage. Quite often when either side has become heated, someone will say something they don't really mean and will regret.
Second, in a verbal disagreement, people are usually formulating their next response instead of listening to the other person. Listen, really listen. Pausing to listen and then really think about your response before verbalizing it.
Third, the heat usually comes when someone is told they are "wrong." If those words come from you, your grown child starts digging in. Don't tell someone they are wrong. If you have concerns or see flaws, ask questions. "Have you thought about...? Do you have a plan to deal with the possibility of...? If your child tells you that you are wrong, ask them to explain what their concerns are. Then tell them you will think about those concerns
Third, go to YouTube. Search "Stoic philosophy" watch the videos. Learn the difference between responding and reacting.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZWLm44zcTMg&list=PLn-a5qvj79quwRrIr5gv1ooY4-di8Y6JW&index=13
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dLwrgrtyMYc&list=PLn-a5qvj79quwRrIr5gv1ooY4-di8Y6JW&index=17
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SyKZRbhDcsg&list=PLn-a5qvj79quwRrIr5gv1ooY4-di8Y6JW&index=12
Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube.
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PO3 Phyllis Maynard
Maj John Bell it took me seven years to stop hitting that wall. When I proceeded to cash out the legacy I left for him and his future family, to plan to sell off valuables. I realized I need to really hear him and give him a chance to articulate his facts vs how things appeared.
After parents plan and sacrifice for children to have a head start in life, they seem to put their brains into "drive stupid" mode. Peers who have done nothing for their parents, have done nothing with their lives, has given nothing back to their communities have some kind of mythical power over kids who have bright futures ahead. These grifters start to plan how to swindle the child's future because the child (my child) is gullible and over trusting to a sob story. These grifters are in it for the long day pay off.
He spoke his truth to me. He reminded me he was gullible and had money and possessions swindled out of him through college and 5 or 6 years after. From him, "as of today, I am not a dummy. I might look like a dummy". I am not a kid, now.
But many very accomplished, hardworking people get tricked everyday. Some even marry the tricksters have children and then clean them out of everything they have worked for, in life.
After parents plan and sacrifice for children to have a head start in life, they seem to put their brains into "drive stupid" mode. Peers who have done nothing for their parents, have done nothing with their lives, has given nothing back to their communities have some kind of mythical power over kids who have bright futures ahead. These grifters start to plan how to swindle the child's future because the child (my child) is gullible and over trusting to a sob story. These grifters are in it for the long day pay off.
He spoke his truth to me. He reminded me he was gullible and had money and possessions swindled out of him through college and 5 or 6 years after. From him, "as of today, I am not a dummy. I might look like a dummy". I am not a kid, now.
But many very accomplished, hardworking people get tricked everyday. Some even marry the tricksters have children and then clean them out of everything they have worked for, in life.
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A1C Medrick "Rick" DeVaney
I HAD The Answers, With All Related Information And Complete Documentations
but i was wrong
but i was wrong
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